Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I have a physical exam scheduled this month. I’m feeling unsure as to whether I should schedule a bikini wax before the appointment or not. Is that type of landscaping as regular as underarm and leg shaving, or am I watching too much reality TV? I haven’t been in dating mode (I have a broken heart) for eight years, but I’d be quite embarrassed if my doctor fainted. — Too Shy to Sign My Name, Winnipeg
Dear Too Shy: Doctors don’t care if you have a bikini wax or not. They do advise against the Brazilian (the extreme bikini-style wax with just a landing strip in the middle) or the L.A. (the entire lower area) for health reasons, but nobody seems to pay much attention. You will be in your doctor’s good books if you don’t do any of that. A regular bikini wax won’t even be noticed.
What you do need as well as a physical is relationship counselling to help you with your stalled broken heart. Untended wounds like that can affect your health negatively.
Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My fiancée and I may break up over where we want to live. She lives in Regina and I live in Winnipeg. Obviously Winnipeg is a bigger, better city for business. I’m from Regina and she said she thought I’d move "home" to marry her where both sets of families are. What?
We plan to have kids and she says it’s only logical we have them near the grandparents for babysitting and close family relationships. I am shocked she took that for granted. I’m on my way, business-wise, and a move to Toronto will be part of my life plan within three years. How can she presume it’s OK to hold me back?
I don’t know what to do. I love her, but frankly I love her less now she has pulled what feels like an ultimatum: Regina or nothing. What should I do? — On the Rise, Downtown Winnipeg
Dear Rise: Before you set any dates, or pay for any wedding halls, you need pre-marriage counselling of the most rigorous and transparent kind because this marriage may not be a go.
You don’t mention your lady’s career, if she has one, and you don’t mention what your future marriage and family would look like. Does your fiancée plan to quit working after she has the first baby? Are you two on board together for one child or six? Will you have children right away or starting in five years? Will you get extended-family help or not? Will you be travelling for work? Is your job transferable or is the only way to the top through larger cities?
Answers to such questions should not be surprises at this point, yet your fiancée didn’t seem to know about your career dreams until now. If she wants a hometown boy settling back into hometown life, she may not be the kind of woman you want. There’s nothing wrong with what she envisions for her own future, but you two may have to find different mates.
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