Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 13/8/2012 (1536 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.
DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: A close friend and I had a falling out over cookies. I made cookies for her mother’s birthday as a gift. I was to drop them off the next afternoon but lost track of time — studying for finals. I decided to bring the cookies to the dinner that night. My "friend" messaged as I approached the restaurant, "Where are my, I mean, my mom’s cookies?" I apologized and explained and asked to drop them off later that evening. She flipped, and said no. I tried making arrangements the next day, but no answer. She later sent me a hostile email filled with swears saying, "How dare you cut me with this?" I apologized and left them in our locker a few days later at university. I have yet to receive a thankyou for the cookies or an apology for the nasty letter. How could cookies end a friendship? Since then, she’s been getting close to my former ex whom I had a bad falling out with. Am I wrong to feel hurt, and very angry? My boyfriend tells me, "Good riddance to bad rubbish!"— Discontented Cookie, Winnipeg
Dear Discontented: Since this frenemy wanted to make a play for your ex, she needed an excuse to distance herself from you. The cookie fight was perfect and she used it. It’s interesting you thought you deserved a thank you note for that birthday gift — the debated object. That’s never going to happen as she doesn’t want the friendship back. Your current boyfriend is right when he says "good riddance." Why can’t YOU let it go?
Close friends who go after a person’s exes aren’t playing by the rules of BFF decency, so why would you ever take her back? Disdain her instead of obsessing over her.
Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I met a guy in a downtown park whom I really liked. We went to a late afternoon movie and had a bite to eat and a few drinks afterwards. By that time, it getting dark so I invited him to my place and one thing led to another. After the fun was all over he said, ‘You know, that was really great. I haven’t had sex with a woman for a long time." I said, "What exactly do you mean by that?"
Then he said, "I’m bisexual, but usually attracted to men, although I find you very sexy." I was completely shocked.
My mouth opened and shut like a guppy." I mean, he’s such a manly man — all muscled like an Olympic athlete. He asked to see me again and I said I’d have to think about it. I really like him, Should I call him? — Caught in a Bind, Winnipeg
Dear Caught: Ambivalence is generally a no vote, so it’s best to step away now. This guy can’t offer you monogamy, should you want it down the line. He’s primarily interested in men, and you were a rare exception. Enjoy the compliment, but don’t bank on a relationship. Did you used condoms, by the way? A handsome bisexual guy having casual sex with both sexes, may be in a good position to spread a sexually-transmitted infection if there is no protection.
Please email problems for Miss Lonelyhearts to firstname.lastname@example.org or send letters to 1355 Mountain Ave. R2X 3B6.