Winnipeg Free Press - PRINT EDITION

Clean up your act for you, and her

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DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: Weekends are the hardest times for me, because it's when I used to see my girlfriend, but now she has run away from me and her life in Winnipeg. I know she's in Vancouver, but I don't know where. She left me a note, took her clothes and bummed a ride to Vancouver with someone. She wrote that she was going to "start a new life" and somebody she knows from back home had offered her a straight job in a restaurant where he's the manager. So OK, she was in with a bad crowd here, and I guess I count myself in that. She started doing some hard drugs like I do and a little hooking, but she was my one and only true love and I respected her and loved her. I can't go back to Vancouver because I have enemies there, so I must stay here and dream of her. What can I do to get her back? I don't even know where to send an email to beg her. It's like she has totally disappeared from my life. She said "don't follow me" and that just broke my heart. -- Lost Without Her, Downtown

Dear Lost: She wants to clean up her life, and you admit you weren't helping. Think of staying away from her as the best gift you can give her right now. If she wants to communicate again, she knows where to find you. It's all up to her now. This would be a good time to clean up your own life -- getting off the drugs -- so that if she ever called you, you could honestly tell her you wouldn't be a bad influence on her anymore. But you have to do it for you, not just for her. Are you there yet?

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I found myself very bothered by a statement made by The Belcher (who tried to throw up to stop her indigestion and endless belching on a first date.) As sympathetic as I am to anyone experiencing an unfortunate (albeit very human problem) at an inconvenient time, her statement implying that "the skinny girls" are oh-so-skilled in the art of throwing up, made me want to throw up. Yes it's a shame that our current society equates being thin with being beautiful. But, that being said, many people don't understand that body-shaming is not OK in any shape or form (or size). We are all different, and your size is not an accurate reflection of your health. I'm actually surprised you didn't correct her; this way of thinking is rude and ignorant. -- Not Bulimic, Winnipeg

Dear Not Bulimic: This was a spiteful statement made by a young girl who was mad and embarrassed about her behaviour. Your points are well-made. I didn't go after her as I could see the real source of her pain -- her body betraying her on a first date with a guy she liked.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: Not to give medical or any other kind of advice, but may I suggest that an Oval capsule, taken just before eating, can help to calm the stomach and prevent such an embarrassment in the future? Oval is available in the baby department of drugstores. -- Just So You Know, Winnipeg.

Dear Just So You Know: If it's mild enough for babies, Oval (for baby gas) might be just the ticket for a young woman with occasional gas problems and a social calendar, But, she should ask her doctor about that harsh belching session and why it happened and what would be the best medication for her to take as needed.


Republished from the Winnipeg Free Press print edition September 29, 2012 G6

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