Winnipeg Free Press - PRINT EDITION

Did that slap not tell you something?

  • Print

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: My old mother slapped me across the face last night and I'm still in shock. She's 87 but she can still pack a wallop. I'd had too much to drink and had spoken disrespectfully to my wife -- called her a bitch. Mom says, "You're still my son and it appears you have one more lesson to learn. WHAP. Don't ever speak to your wife like that again." I quickly walked to the truck and drove home. My wife stayed with my mother. When she came home today, she told me to go to Alcoholics Anonymous or find another place to live (my mother's influence). I'm not ready to quit drinking with my friends, I work hard and it's the only fun I have. What should I do? -- Need My Beer and Friends, Wpg.

Dear Needing: Here's what you can do -- respect what the lady says and find another place to live. But, if you take a hard look at that new reality and start feeling deeply upset, you may want to reconsider. Ask yourself how you got on a path where you have nothing better to do for fun than get drunk. I'm guessing you don't go out to movies or events with her, see other couples, play sports, try out new restaurants or travel together. You're just a roommate now, and an absentee one most of the time. And think about your wife, who started out as the love of your life. It can't be fun to be married to you now you have no interests, drink hard and call her ugly names. There's way more to a fun life than drinking with buddies in a bar, and way more to a real marriage than a wedding licence. Should you change your mind about A.A., call 942-0126.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I wanted to comment on the letter from the young woman who's falling in love with a man 17 years her senior. Twenty years ago, I started falling for a man at work, also 17 years older than me. We initially developed a friendship based on similar values, and we started falling in love. He tried to dissuade me initially -- telling me I should be with someone my own age. I convinced him otherwise and we got married three years later. We're still together. My husband hadn't been married before and we had our first child a few years ago. There are some age-difference challenges your reader should know about. By the time I'm ready to retire, my husband may not have the health or energy for travelling. It's likely I'll outlive him by quite a few years. But life is unpredictable. I count myself lucky to have spent the past 20 years with my soulmate. One challenge I hadn't expected was finding friends. People my husband's age are empty-nesters; people my age don't always feel comfortable socializing with someone old enough to be their father. Luckily, both of our families accept us. -- 20 Years Later,Still the One!

Dear Still The One: People who've had to face obstacles to be together often have a stronger bond because they retain a part of new love -- "feeling lucky to be together." They don't take each other for granted. In some ways, it's good to know our days are numbered. We live more intensely, opt for making love rather than letting the night go by, treat each other better daily, air our grievances faster and make up more quickly. People who are aware of their mortality often say "Love you" when they say goodbye in case those are last words. It's too intense to live every day like it's our last, but we are fools if we put things off for months and years thinking we have all the time in the world together.

lovecoach@hotmail.com

Republished from the Winnipeg Free Press print edition April 23, 2012 D2

Fact Check

Fact Check

Have you found an error, or know of something we’ve missed in one of our stories?
Please use the form below and let us know.

* Required
  • Please post the headline of the story or the title of the video with the error.

  • Please post exactly what was wrong with the story.

  • Please indicate your source for the correct information.

  • Yes

    No

  • This will only be used to contact you if we have a question about your submission, it will not be used to identify you or be published.

  • Cancel

Having problems with the form?

Contact Us Directly
  • Print

You can comment on most stories on winnipegfreepress.com. You can also agree or disagree with other comments. All you need to do is be a Winnipeg Free Press print or e-edition subscriber to join the conversation and give your feedback.

You can comment on most stories on winnipegfreepress.com. You can also agree or disagree with other comments. All you need to do is be a Winnipeg Free Press print or e-edition subscriber to join the conversation and give your feedback.

Have Your Say

New to commenting? Check out our Frequently Asked Questions.

Have Your Say

Comments are open to Winnipeg Free Press print or e-edition subscribers only. why?

Have Your Say

Comments are open to Winnipeg Free Press Subscribers only. why?

The Winnipeg Free Press does not necessarily endorse any of the views posted. By submitting your comment, you agree to our Terms and Conditions. These terms were revised effective April 16, 2010.

letters

Make text: Larger | Smaller

LATEST VIDEO

Tree remover has special connection to Grandma Elm

View more like this

Photo Store Gallery

  • JJOE.BRYKSA@FREEPRESS.MB.CA Local-Postcard  Day-Horror frost and fog created a most beautiful setting at Assiniboine Park Thursday morning in WInnipeg- Enviroent Canada says the fog will lifet this morning and will see a high of -7C-  JOE BRYKSA/WINNIPEG FREE PRESS- Feb 18, 2010
  • Two Canadian geese perch themselves for a perfect view looking at the surroundings from the top of a railway bridge near Lombard Ave and Waterfront Drive in downtown Winnipeg- Standup photo- May 01, 2012   (JOE BRYKSA / WINNIPEG FREE PRESS)

View More Gallery Photos

Poll

Will you miss Grandma Elm?

View Results

View Related Story

Ads by Google