DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: Are men all louses with big egos? I didn't leave my late husband because he told me would commit suicide, and how he would do it. After he finally died, I met a widower and thought I had gone to heaven. For six years, we lived together, spending mostly my money. I was working full time; he was retired. I found out he cheated on his wife, who was the love of his life, but she actually died of a heart attack after they were already separated! He cheated on me, too, at his cottage up north. I dropped him, heartbroken. Today I live with a supposed platonic friend, who had been my boyfriend and lover but he is also a big liar! I have kicked him out several times. Since I can use someone to paint, dig the garden, carry out the garbage and shovel, now he's got a roof over his head again. Do I think I will find Mr. Wonderful? I doubt it. I have dated some good men in my working career. Are there any more left? -- Senior Gal, Winnipeg
Dear Senior Gal: The word "supposed" is the tip-off this relationship is not platonic. You've decided to "use" the guy back. I'm guessing he's getting a home for the price of chores and sex once in a while. You wonder if there aren't some good guys out there? Yes there are, and more come free every day. But they won't be coming near you if they see this arrangement in place. You sincerely want to meet good men? Get yourself free and available, and get a part-time job where men are your customers.
Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I just found a guy on Facebook I used to date in the '80s. We had big hair, danced in clubs, wore crazy clothes and loved each other crazy -- for three wonderful months. Then his ex told him she was four months' pregnant with his child. She cried outside his house for nearly a week and then he took her in, because she had no home and was couch-surfing. They lived common law. OK, that baby has grown up and my old ex is free now. But, he's recently sent me recent pictures. He's not the guy he used to be -- has a paunch, hair fell out. I'm single and lonely. He wants to see me. Should I see him? -- Tempted To See the Man
Dear Tempted: Why not? Facebook is not "real." See how you like being near him for real -- his voice, his words, his smell, his casual touch. If he leaves you cold, have a polite coffee and a nice conversation, and say bye-bye. If you find the same attractive compatible guy is still living inside that body, investigate further! This is a life drama, and they don't come along often. Don't miss it, and please report back.
Questions or comments? Please email firstname.lastname@example.org or send letters c/o Miss Lonelyhearts, 1350 Mountain Ave. Winnipeg R2X 3B6.