Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I'm not sexually twisted as my boyfriend laughingly says, but I do like women as well as men, which is to his advantage since he gets threesomes quite regularly. I used to be a "lipstick lesbian" (a feminine-style lesbian) but I found this sweet guy I like and he taught me how nice men can be both in bed and out. It's fun to experience the whole spectrum of sexuality, rather than just women. Having said that, I can never give up women altogether and now he says he's falling in love with me and he's starting to get hurt and nasty about other women. I can't promise him I'll stop seeing women because I won't. Now he thinks he wants to get married and have kids with me. I'd rather raise children with another woman -- a second mommy is more useful than a daddy to my way of thinking. So where does that leave me? -- Stuck in the Middle, Wolseley
Dear Stuck: You've had a lovely fling with this fellow, but it seems he is a side dish in the overall picture. He's pushing the envelope -- marriage and kids -- to see where you stand and it is forcing you to figure out where you stand. It's not with him as your life companion, although it's been a learning experience and you have mellowed a lot in regards to the male species. This will help if you end up raising a son one day. It might be time to say goodbye to this man and stop wasting his time. Thank each other for the wonderful experiences and get out before things get sad, angry and mean.
Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I found out the hard way (a photo sent to me) my son is panhandling for money. He lives at his girlfriend's parents' home in another city and goes to university, yet goes out panhandling with his guitar and singing for money. I'm afraid he's with bad people and doing drugs. I'm broken-hearted, scared and embarrassed. I can't go grab him and bring him home to Winnipeg because he's too old. Why would he do this? We are well-off, gave him everything and had money saved for a big education, which he used up taking his first degree and never working once to help out. Now he's on his own financially and goes panhandling! What can I do? -- Distraught Mom, Winnipeg
Dear Distraught: Could you be confusing panhandling with busking? People who busk -- many famous singers have done it -- simply play music for the public and people throw money into their music cases for the pleasure of listening. Buskers don't usually hang out in groups.
Panhandlers might clean your car windows or hold up a sign asking for money and are often hanging out together. They may or may not be abusing liquor and drugs. Find out which he is doing and write back. If he is busking, living under a warm roof and going to university, he has found a way to earn his next degree and you don't need to worry yourself like into the ground like this.