DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: My boyfriend of nine months loves me "very, very much" and I love him very much, too. He wants to marry me. He told me about his ex-girlfriend who's causing a lot of problems, because she wants him back. She doesn't like me and tries to break us up, flooding him with emails and phone calls. I asked him to write her back to stop emailing and calling him. Last week I found out where she lives and drove by her house, and a short time after I saw my boyfriend drive by. He was very surprised to see me there, but he didn't go in. He said there's nothing going on -- he just wanted to drop something off. She only calls him when she needs help with something, and he feels sorry for her. He said it's over. On Valentine's Day he went out for dinner with someone else instead of with me. The problem we're having now is he won't let me see her emails. He says it's private, and he's writing back to her. I did see the email he sent to her not to call or email him again. I don't know if I can trust him. Do I have the right to see his emails? What do you think? I feel that he is hiding something from me and not being totally honest with me. -- In the Dark, Winnipeg
Dear Dark: Listen to your feelings. He's hiding a lot -- and for nine months now. He'd make a lousy, cheating husband. It's shocking how much bad treatment you take. He let you sit there while he had dinner with another woman (her) on Valentine's Day and you're still with him? Of course it's her! By the way, that's only three weeks ago. What kind of "love" is he showing you? Stop sticking around, acting like it's a contest you hope to win. He's enjoying the ultimate ego massage of having two women fight over him. He takes her emails and phone calls when he could block them, and he also drops by her house. Let yourself imagine why! A woman who wants a guy back will pull out all the stops and that includes the best sex he'll ever get, at least from her.
Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I slap my boyfriend's face regularly, and he loves it. He likes a woman who is feisty and he has a rude mouth so I correct him on that every time he says something vulgar. When he told his older sister about this, she wanted to call the police on me. I went over and told her, "It's just a game play and he loves it." She slapped me then, and said I was a liar and not to lay a hand on her brother again or she would "kick my butt." She weighs 200 pounds. Why should we have to quit something that turns us both on because of her stupid opinion? -- Petite Dominant, Elmwood
Dear Petite: It's interesting that he told his oldest sister, who is protective of him, about this "game." It sounds like it's been escalating into something he's no longer comfortable with. Note, he was clever enough to go through his big sister rather than tell you directly he was tired of it. You scare him now! Look, you can't blame the sister for giving you a taste of your own medicine. She will call the cops if you keep abusing her younger brother (whether he started off liking it or not). Change your act, or move on. This guy has had enough of this kind of kinkiness.