17°c Overcast
14°c Cloudy periods
Winnipeg Free Press - PRINT EDITION
No such thing as 'too old'; seize the day and shack up
DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: I'm 70, and my boyfriend of a year is 88. We have gradually gotten to know each other, have so much in common, with lots of conversations, outings and fun. We have fallen in love. Our grown children like each of us. Recently he has "proposed" that he move into my wonderful small house. His plan involves renovating my basement so he can have his own private space. He says he wants to be my "house husband" (he's a great cook). He's a lovely man, lively mentally and physically. We planned an overseas trip this summer to meet both our daughters and families. I am torn between wanting his company and fearing this change. I have happily lived alone for the last seven years. Some of my friends encourage me. Others say he's too old, and I'd be getting myself into a terrible mess. All I have said to him is that I will discuss it. -- Ambivalent, Winnipeg
Dear Ambivalent: Go for the gusto! Enjoy each other to the fullest in your wonderful little house and realize this man is aware you might need a little space, so he will happily make a little suite in the basement. Why not? Your discouraging friends are jealous that you have found somebody, so ignore their negativity. What is the total value of a wonderful small house on its own? If you can also fill it with the love and joy and laughter of two people, why not make it a great big house of love? So what if your man lives another year or another 10 years? You're 70. You could get sick tomorrow and die before he does. Take a chance! That is what living the best life is all about. If you don't do this, you may regret it all your life. If you do it, and it doesn't work out, you will just change the arrangement. But then, at least you gave it your best try and you know.
Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: There are booty buddies and there are friends with benefits. I thought I was getting a friend with benefits, but that isn't happening. Instead I have this 24-year-old woman who drops in after the bar on the weekend, with a quick call first from her cell. If I am home, she cabs it over and we have a sex right away. It is great sex. I need it; I am young. But then she wants the boyfriend extras, like cuddling and conversation and back rubs and watching a movie together. Then she goes home in a cab. I wake up and miss her all day. By dinner time, I want to call her. She doesn't answer. I don't want to be alone on the weekends. -- Her Booty Boy, Osborne Village
Dear Booty Boy: By the time you and Booty Babe finally part, you are overtired and vulnerable, which makes everything worse. This would only work as a booty call if both parties found the other one boring or ridiculous outside of sex and didn't want the extras with each other. How about consciously putting effort into going out and finding a new girlfriend on the weekends so you aren't even available when she calls? It's the boyfriend thing that does you in, so if you weaken and let her visit, at least stop giving her that and getting the emotional hangover. Call the cab for her and say you are tired. You are a pit stop, and she's getting way more out of this than you are. You need a real girlfriend who stays the night and makes love with you in the morning.
Questions or comments? Please email lovecoach@hotmail.com or send letters c/o Miss Lonelyhearts, 1350 Mountain Ave. Winnipeg R2X 3B6
Republished from the Winnipeg Free Press print edition February 19, 2013 D4
More Diversions
- Back to Top
- Return to Diversions
More Diversions
(1 of 15 articles for this week)
Today's Horoscope
1:00 AM 0SUNDAY, MAY 26, 2013
MOON ALERT Avoid shopping or making important decisions from 5:15 a.m. until 4:30 p.m. After that the ...
Poll
Most Popular Diversions
- Negotiate deal with your wife that works for both of you
- Today's Horoscope
- Don't wear yourself out trying to win her back
- Police in Wisconsin say 'Thong Cape Scooter Man' not breaking law, free to ride on
- Tell the building manager and the peep show will end
- Tell your dad what you think
- Today’s Horoscope
- Woman run over three times by her own car
- Tell husband you're not talking to her... maybe tell him why
- Veterinary surgeons remove basketball-sized hairball from tiger in US that stopped eating
- Tell husband you're not talking to her... maybe tell him why
- Tell your dad what you think
- Don't wear yourself out trying to win her back
- Tell the building manager and the peep show will end
- Negotiate deal with your wife that works for both of you
- Tell your 'best friend' to try women his age
- You need to vent and cry, then write a tough review
- Today's horoscope
- Today's Horoscope
- Today’s Horoscope
- Cheating ex-boyfriend not worth the heartache
- Go back to see him again, but keep eyes, ears open
- It was 'just' sex to him; he doesn't want you around
- Time to pack up your new boobs, say goodbye?
- Tell your 'best friend' to try women his age
- Your praise made this nerd look like a stud
- You need to vent and cry, then write a tough review
- Tell husband you're not talking to her... maybe tell him why
- Ask your mother, but do it gently
- He's keeping his cross-dressing life in the trunk
- Today's Horoscope
- Veterinary surgeons remove basketball-sized hairball from tiger in US that stopped eating
- Woman run over three times by her own car
- Durango, Colo., area couple gives up fight to keep catwalk for kitties to leave 2nd floor unit
- Woman, 80 accidentally swallows $5,000 diamond at Tampa, Fla., charity event
- US zoo looking into conception mystery after birth of anteater; no male in pen
- Calgary Stampede releases midway treats, including deep-fried butter
- Haiku horoscopes
- Today's Horoscope
- 2 pounds of loose skin removed from Obie, the formerly fat Oregon dog; lost 40 pounds on diet
- Ask your girlfriend to man up and level with you
- Albertan's $15.8M lottery win all because he listened to his wife
- Smokejumpers parachute into illegal marijuana garden in US national forest
Ads by Google
You can comment on most stories on winnipegfreepress.com. You can also agree or disagree with other comments. All you need to do is register and/or login and you can join the conversation and give your feedback.
Have Your Say
New to commenting? Check out our Frequently Asked Questions.
The Winnipeg Free Press does not necessarily endorse any of the views posted. By submitting your comment, you agree to our Terms and Conditions. These terms were revised effective April 16, 2010.