Winnipeg Free Press - PRINT EDITION

Offer to wear ex's perfume-scented robe stinks

  • Print

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I was visiting my boyfriend's house and he invited me to stay overnight. When it was a bit chilly, he popped out a pink lady's robe for me to wear, not new, smelling of perfume. I said, "Whose is this?" and he muttered, "old girlfriend." I took it off and threw it on the bed. I certainly wouldn't be wearing the clothing of another woman who had slept with him.

Then I felt kind of revolted and didn't feel like sleeping with him. I got dressed in a hurry, got in the car and drove home. It was a long, cold ride and I was feeling off-kilter all the way home, and thinking about dumping him. When I got in, there was a message from him on my land line saying, "I don't want to see you again. I've had enough of drama queens."

I emailed him back: "Maybe if you don't hand everybody the drama-queen robe to be re-used you wouldn't have this problem!" I just consulted my best friend and he said this was a hot guy (he's good-looking and plays football) and I overreacted to the robe. Do you think I did? -- Doubting Myself, Osborne Village

Dear Doubting: You reacted emotionally to an ex's robe, like any other woman would. This guy will go through a lot of girlfriends if he doesn't learn from your response. Nine guys out of 10 would have known that was a dumb move. He should have dropped that perfumed garment in a bag and returned it to his ex long ago, or chucked it, if she didn't want it back. At least he could have washed it before he offered it to another woman! It's enough to make you wonder if he still likes the smell of his ex in his closet. What he could have done is offer you his robe -- a gallant move and much smarter, as it could be a turn-on to you, if you like his smell.

It's amusing he beat you to the punch on the breakup. He suspected you were going to ditch him and he found a way to save face. This guy has some notion of strategy, but it'll get him further on a football field than in the bedroom. Ignore your buddy's advice.

 

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My new live-in girlfriend is a lousy cook, but acts like she owns the kitchen and makes the same thing every night: it's always pork chops, corn and apple sauce. When I have tried to cook, so there's some variety, she says, "What's the matter, don't you like my cooking?"

Frankly, I am sick of it! She could start cooking for a prison and they'd be begging for the old cook back. She probably eats the same 10 foods every week and nothing else. What is the matter? Does she have a numb palate? Last night I told her she was finished as the cook and I was taking over. She said, "Fine, I'll go out to eat!" And she did. Now what? I'm 28 and have never lived with a woman before. I love her, but I'm a... Much Better Cook, River Heights

Dear Cook: Living together with a new person requires a lot of adjustments. Your girlfriend somehow got the idea the woman in a relationship was expected to do all the cooking, even though she clearly doesn't groove on it. Have a big talk, apologize for saying you would "take over" and tell her you'd like to learn to cook, even if that's only half true.

Then work out a deal where you cook every second night. When it's your turn, make double what you need to end up with tasty leftovers to add to the pork chops you know she'll be cooking the next night. Buy a wider variety of foods, but not much of each, so you're getting good nutrition and have different ingredients for your half of the food prep that week. Also, watch to see what she orders at restaurants and learn to cook those things for her at home.

You can work this living-together problem out, as it's not a personality mismatch, but stop being so high-handed with your phrases like, "I'm taking over." You may be Prince Charming, but you're not the king.

 

Please send your questions or comments c/o lovecoach@hotmail.com or mail letters to Miss Lonelyhearts c/oWinnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6

Republished from the Winnipeg Free Press print edition May 13, 2014 C4

Fact Check

Fact Check

Have you found an error, or know of something we’ve missed in one of our stories?
Please use the form below and let us know.

* Required
  • Please post the headline of the story or the title of the video with the error.

  • Please post exactly what was wrong with the story.

  • Please indicate your source for the correct information.

  • Yes

    No

  • This will only be used to contact you if we have a question about your submission, it will not be used to identify you or be published.

  • Cancel

Having problems with the form?

Contact Us Directly
  • Print

You can comment on most stories on winnipegfreepress.com. You can also agree or disagree with other comments. All you need to do is be a Winnipeg Free Press print or e-edition subscriber to join the conversation and give your feedback.

You can comment on most stories on winnipegfreepress.com. You can also agree or disagree with other comments. All you need to do is be a Winnipeg Free Press print or e-edition subscriber to join the conversation and give your feedback.

Have Your Say

New to commenting? Check out our Frequently Asked Questions.

Have Your Say

Comments are open to Winnipeg Free Press print or e-edition subscribers only. why?

Have Your Say

Comments are open to Winnipeg Free Press Subscribers only. why?

The Winnipeg Free Press does not necessarily endorse any of the views posted. By submitting your comment, you agree to our Terms and Conditions. These terms were revised effective April 16, 2010.

letters

Make text: Larger | Smaller

LATEST VIDEO

The greening of Elphaba the Wicked Witch in Wicked

View more like this

Photo Store Gallery

  • JOE.BRYKSA@FREEPRESS.MB.CA Local-(  Standup photo)-    A butterfly looks for nector on a lily Tuesday afternoon in Wolseley-JOE BRYKSA/WINNIPEG FREE PRESS- June 22, 2010
  • The sun peers through the fog to illuminate a tree covered in hoar frost near Headingley, Manitoba Thursday- Standup photo- February 02, 2012   (JOE BRYKSA / WINNIPEG FREE PRESS)

View More Gallery Photos

Poll

Do high-profile endorsements for political candidates influence your voting decisions?

View Results

View Related Story

Ads by Google