DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: My boyfriend lost his job six or seven months ago. His pride prevents him from working a minimum-wage job, so he's on computer playing games all the time. That makes him shut down, as he focuses only on the game. Normally, this only lasts a few weeks, and I can handle it since we play the same games. But I've become so frustrated. I love him so much it hurts to even think of losing him, but I haven't seen him in person since July and he lives only a few blocks away. He usually comes back before it gets to where my depression takes over from loneliness and feeling neglected. But it's been months and he says he doesn't want to come over to my place because there isn't anything to do here. Since I'm a single mom, I can't go out after my son's in bed. And anyway his dad, brother and he are always together in the backroom with the TV and computer at his house. Even when I have money to take us to a movie, he won't go because he can't pay. Please help. -- In a Bind, Winnipeg
Dear Bind: You may have loved this guy, but he doesn't seem to love you. He lives mere blocks from you and has not bothered to see you since July. He is finished, and you should be too. You have no sex life with him, no social life, cuddling, closeness. You are demoted to a computer-game partner. Since you're old enough to have a child, you need a grown-up guy in your life, not an overgrown adolescent guy on computer who is too "proud" (or lazy) to get work. When he says there's nothing to do at your house, he means you're not of personal interest to him. A loving boyfriend would come over in the evenings and watch movies with you, play games, talk with you, cook with you and make love. He'd play with your child. Tell Computer Boy goodbye and make room in your life for a new man who's there for you and your child, body and soul.
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