You should get tested for STDs if you think husband played along

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: I'm so mad I have been screaming the house down! My husband brought his guy friends into our house, while I was away on holiday, for a poker party. That's not the worst! I've just found evidence there were women here. The poker prizes were not all money. The garbage bag on the back porch ripped, and I found booze bottles, cigar ends, hard liquor bottles -- and whipped cream aerosol cans. What group of guys needs 10 whipped cream cans? My husband admits they weren't alone, but is holding back from telling the whole truth. He swears the other guys might have been doing things, but HE didn't do anything. Do you believe him? -- Horrified Wife, Winnipeg

Dear Horrified: No matter what happened later, Hubby let them in to your house, and I'll bet it wasn't at gunpoint. You have to decide what you want to believe, as these guys are not likely going to rat each other out. You might call some of the wives, however, to ensure it never happens again. And you might want to use a barrier method of birth control, like a good quality latex condom, and get yourself tested for sexually-transmitted diseases if you suspect he did partake.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I ran into a girlfriend at the bakery and we shared our favourite sweet treat tips. Then she asked me to go for coffee. When we were talking, she mentioned casually she had always wondered what it would be like to go to bed with me. We were so young when we were dating it never got to that. We both laughed it off as we're married, but it has been on my mind. Was she really "wondering" or was she "asking," and I was too stupid to get it? I wanted nothing more than to have sex with her when I was 17. She was the one that got away. I have not been totally true to my wife, though I have a pretty good track record. This woman just left a message for me to "friend" her on Facebook. Am I reading more into this than I should. Do you think she's going after me? -- Leaping To Conclusions? South End

Dear Leaping: Women have a pretty good idea what they're doing when they mention unfulfilled fantasies involving the guy in front of them. Now this old flame is after the Facebook connection, you can safely guess that was a come-on, even if she isn't entirely sure if she wants to cheat or not. She planted the seed, and the idea is germinating, and she will know that. If you don't want to go any further than this, quietly ignore the Facebook offer. It isn't entirely innocent. Having said that, you and I both know you're so curious you'll check her Facebook to see friends, family and the rival -- her husband. So have a quick peek and back off if you can.

Questions or comments? Write Miss Lonelyhearts c/o Winnipeg Free Press 1355 Mountain Ave. Wpg R2X 3B6 or email lovecoach@hotmail.com

Republished from the Winnipeg Free Press print edition May 3, 2012 D4