Winnipeg Free Press - PRINT EDITION

You're cheating: that's why you feel so guilty

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DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: I'm in my mid-30s, married for 15 years. My husband and I have two wonderful teenage daughters and I love him very much. However, he was not my first love. I have been in contact with my first love for three years. All the messaging we've done has involved expressing our past feelings for each other. He has been there for me when my husband shut me out. But all this has brought feelings back. I know deep down that nothing will ever come of this (he lives on another continent and I could never cheat on my husband). My issue is I can't get him out of my head. I wake up from numerous dreams of cheating on my husband. I feel guilty and I have not even done anything. My husband knows nothing about this and I can't tell him as he's a very jealous type. Help! -- Confused Wife, Wpg.

Dear Confused Wife: You are cheating on your husband emotionally with this online affair. When you stop, it will stop fuelling your dreams. The more you chat, the more you fantasize -- with your ex in the starring role. How would you like your husband connecting with an old love online and having sexual dreams about her, not you? Focus on the reason you broke up with the first man and ask yourself how you can improve your marriage. Or is it more fun having two loves and paying a certain price in guilt?

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I have a new, hot car. I like to take it out and drive it late at night when no one is around, and I like to go very, very fast. My girlfriend wants to know where I am going and why I won't take her. I just say I'm going for a drive to clear my head, but she thinks I'm up to no good. How do I prove to her I'm out speeding and I don't want to endanger her? -- Zzzoom! Tuxedo

Dear Zzzoom: You ARE up to no good. You're endangering your girlfriend emotionally by taking chances with your life. And you could also kill other people -- like my 20-something kids, who are out on the road late at night, buster. On top of that, you're hurting your girlfriend with your secretive late-night excursions. Grow up, before you lose her over that car. And this spring, get yourself to a bona fide racetrack.

Questions or comments? Write Miss Lonelyhearts c/o Winnipeg Free Press 1355 Mountain Ave. Wpg R2X 3B6 or email lovecoach@hotmail.com

Republished from the Winnipeg Free Press print edition January 25, 2013 D6

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