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The Walking Overfed

QUOTE of the day: Conan O'Brien, doing a week of shows in Atlanta, used his monologue the other night to explain the local ethos:

"Producers got the idea to shoot the Walking Dead here when they saw some people coming out of a Waffle House at 2 a.m.

"Speaking of the Waffle House, Atlanta is also home to Arby's, Chick-Fil-A, and get this: Spanx. Which explains Atlanta's new nickname, the City of Cause and Effect."

Shellac of poison

Shut up, you're making me thirsty John Mayer, appearing on Ellen DeGeneres's show, talked about his recent voice problems. Part was acid reflux, he said. Part was "over use and singing and singing and singing."

And then there was "what you put into your body... it didn't help that I really loved, love, loved scotch. It's just like applying poison to your body. It's like applying a shellac of poison. It's just delicious, wonderful poison... I had to really dial it down. And I'm a little more boring now."


Rolling on Lake Zurich

TINA Turner has lived in Switzerland for 15 years now -- she's come a long way from Nutbush, Tenn. -- and so her wedding, to music producer Erwin Bach, will be there, on the shores of Lake Zurich. So says the European magazine Blick.

The two have been together for some time but the engagement is news. There's been no confirmation yet, but no denial either. She's 73.


Matrimony marooned

ADAM Levine, the Maroon 5 frontman and serial babe-dater, says there's no hope of fidelity nowadays.

I think that's what he means by saying he'll never marry because he doesn't want to divorce. Speaking to a mag called Nylon Guys, he says that although he is "doing pretty well" in dating, he has figured something out: "If you don't get married, you can't get divorced. Why couldn't we learn from the devastatingly low percentage of successful marriages that our last generation went through?"

Doing pretty well? His latest is top model Behati Prinsloo. He's 34. she's 23.


Taking relationship out of park

SPOTLIGHT couple: Amy Poehler, who split with Will Arnett in September, is now dating Nick Kroll, who appears on her sitcom Parks and Recreation.

She's 41. He's 34.


Catch and release

The Finding Nemo sequel is official. Called Finding Dory, it will be out in November, 2015.

(Finding Dory, huh? I am reminded of the insightful observation by my favourite movie critic, Joe Bob Briggs: to do a profitable sequel, just make the exact same movie over again.)


Six feet under... but looking good

DID you see the story about Domenico Dolce and Stefano Gabbana, the designer couple being fined $440 million for tax evasion in Italy? Their empire is worth $5.3 billion, so I imagine they can scrape up the money.

Gabbana sounded unruffled: "In the end who cares? We will all finish up six feet under," he Tweeted. "I am interested in making clothes and that's all. They can do and say what they want."

They could each go to jail for five years, too, although if they pay up, the Important Persons Act will surely kick in.

Dolce's 54. Gabbano's 50.


Follow the sequel road

WARNER Bros owns the immortal 1939 Wizard of Oz movie, and for years declined to soil the classic by going in for a remake or any other sordid money-grubbing gimmicks.

Boy, do they feel stupid now that Disney has made umpteen squjillion dollars from this prequel Oz the Great and Powerful, which it was free to make because the books are so old they're in the public domain.

Talk about a wake-up call! Now Warner's is playing catch-up as hard as they can, reports the Telegraph: they're planning a Wizard of Oz TV show, a 3-D version of the original movie, a merch line, and maybe a sequel movie. (Disney will be doing its own sequel, too.)

Turns out that in 2010, when Disney got rolling on Great and Powerful, Warner's had three sequels in the pipeline, but scuttled them all. Duh!


As long as he doesn't threaten us

AFTER getting jeered at a New York Knicks' game Sunday, Chris Brown said on the Today show that he's trying to rehabilitate his image after that unpleasantness with Rihanna.

However, he said, he understands that "I can't make everybody like me."


Shakespeare in black and white

ORLANDO Bloom makes his Broadway debut in September, in Romeo & Juliet.

At 35, Bloom is about double the age of Shakespeare's hero. And the production will have a gimmick: instead of feuding Italians, this will be about love amid racial strife: Juliet will be played by black actress Condola Rashad, the daughter of Phylicia Rashad who played Clair Huxtable on The Cosby Show.

Director David Leveaux said the casting came first, then the altered premise.

Rashad is 26.


The Stepford Girlfriend

SPOTLIGHT couple: Rachel Bilson and Hayden Christensen have been a couple intermittently for six years.

Now Bilson, telling Cosmo that they're back together, sounds alarmingly like they've moved to Stepford:

"I'm a really good girlfriend - I always put all that first in my life. I'm definitely the person who would make him his favorite dinner to come home to."

"I love to cook, so we make dinner at home a lot and watch movies. I definitely have family on the brain. Having kids is something I want to see in my future."

They're both 31.


Vidal Buffoon

THE late celebrity hair stylist and cosmetics tycoon Vidal Sassoon was a terrible father, his adopted son David told the Daily Mail.

David says Vidal insisted that the lad have laparoscopic weight-loss surgery, because he figured that having a fat son would hurt his image. Later Vidal wrote David out of his British will. Oh, and David blames Vidal for driving his sister Catya to drugs; she died of an overdose in 2002.

Vidal died last year, at 84. His British will, worth maybe $8 million, disinherits David and all three of Vidal's ex-wives. A U.S. will, worth almost $100 million, has yet to be disclosed.

David says his father, hopelessly vain, "created the ultimate dysfunctional family. To be honest, I would have been better off if he had never adopted me. Money and image were all that mattered to him."

David is now 41.

Republished from the Winnipeg Free Press print edition April 7, 2013 ??65524

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