Winnipeg Free Press - PRINT EDITION

Haiku Horoscopes

  • Print

Aries (March 21 - April 19)

Count your blessings -- things

Could always be worse! A song

By Pitbull could play...

 

Taurus (April 20 - May 20)

The devil's in the

Details -- an odd thing to say

About a melon

 

Gemini (May 21 - June 20)

Why did you open

Up that can of worms? It was

Clearly labelled "worms"

 

Cancer (June 21 - July 22)

An apple a day

Is a less-good bribe for your

Teacher than you think

 

Leo (July 23 - Aug. 22)

Kids these days have strange

Ideas, like putting an

End to Lottery

 

Virgo (Aug. 23 - Sept. 22)

Nothing you can say

Will change my mind -- except, of

Course, chanting mind-spells

 

Libra (Sept. 23 - Oct. 22)

Listen closely: You

Can't go around cutting off

Heads (without money)

 

Scorpio (Oct. 23 - Nov. 21)

I hate to tell you

But nobody respects your

Culture, were-frog king

 

Sagittarius (Nov. 22 - Dec. 21)

"Serial killing

Just isn't cool! Stay in school

Kids!" -- well, problem solved

 

Capricorn (Dec. 22 - Jan. 19)

Just take it day by

Day to keep not knowing who

Shia LaBeouf is

 

Aquarius (Jan. 20 - Feb. 18)

This "cutting Bieber

Into strips for quick eating"

Fad has gone too far

 

Pisces (Feb. 19 - March 20)

After many long

Years and much study, we'll learn

Who let the dogs out

Republished from the Winnipeg Free Press print edition February 27, 2014 C2

Fact Check

Fact Check

Have you found an error, or know of something we’ve missed in one of our stories?
Please use the form below and let us know.

* Required
  • Please post the headline of the story or the title of the video with the error.

  • Please post exactly what was wrong with the story.

  • Please indicate your source for the correct information.

  • Yes

    No

  • This will only be used to contact you if we have a question about your submission, it will not be used to identify you or be published.

  • Cancel

Having problems with the form?

Contact Us Directly
  • Print

You can comment on most stories on winnipegfreepress.com. You can also agree or disagree with other comments. All you need to do is be a Winnipeg Free Press print or e-edition subscriber to join the conversation and give your feedback.

You can comment on most stories on winnipegfreepress.com. You can also agree or disagree with other comments. All you need to do is be a Winnipeg Free Press print or e-edition subscriber to join the conversation and give your feedback.

Have Your Say

New to commenting? Check out our Frequently Asked Questions.

Have Your Say

Comments are open to Winnipeg Free Press print or e-edition subscribers only. why?

Have Your Say

Comments are open to Winnipeg Free Press Subscribers only. why?

The Winnipeg Free Press does not necessarily endorse any of the views posted. By submitting your comment, you agree to our Terms and Conditions. These terms were revised effective April 16, 2010.

letters

Make text: Larger | Smaller

LATEST VIDEO

Key of Bart - I Just Want A Race

View more like this

Photo Store Gallery

  • A baby Red Panda in her area at the Zoo. International Red Panda Day is Saturday September 15th and the Assiniboine Park Zoo will be celebrating in a big way! The Zoo is home to three red pandas - Rufus, Rouge and their cub who was born on June 30 of this year. The female cub has yet to be named and the Assiniboine Park Zoo is asking the community to help. September 14, 2012  BORIS MINKEVICH / WINNIPEG FREE PRESS
  • JOE BRYKSA/WINNIPEG FREE PRESS Local- A large osprey lands in it's nest in a hydro pole on Hyw 59  near the Hillside Beach turnoff turn off. Osprey a large narrow winged hawk which can have a wingspan of over 54 inches are making a incredible recovery since pesticide use of the 1950's and  1960's- For the last two decades these fish hawks have been reappearing in the Lake Winnipeg area- Aug 03, 2005

View More Gallery Photos

Poll

What do you think of Prime Minister Stephen Harper’s comment that Tina Fontaine’s slaying was a crime, and not part of a larger sociological problem?

View Results

View Related Story

Ads by Google