Hitting a high note with a left hook?

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Sylvester Stallone as "Rocky," the fictional boxer he portrayed in a series of films starting in 1976. (THE CANADIAN PRESS)

‘HIT me with your best shot."

Theatre-goers and boxing fans alike are cheering the news that Sylvester Stallone is putting together a stage musical about his celluloid hero, Rocky Balboa. Rocky: The Musical is due to open in Hamburg, Germany, in November.

The show is being written by Tony Award winner Thomas Meehan and will focus on the relationship between Rocky and Adrian, instead of on the pugilist's battles with Apollo Creed and Clubber Lang. Rocky: The Musical looks to include a new rendition of Eye of the Tiger but -- sorry, bro -- not Pushin', the tune Sly's brother, Frank, contributed to the Rocky III soundtrack.

"On the surface, it sounds like they're going about things the right way," says Randy Apostle, the artistic director for Celebrations Dinner Theatre. "One of the biggest things I've found in regards to writing musicals is there have to be relationships to build the songs around.

"Because let's face it, singing about beating people up will only get you so far."

Apostle has penned and/or produced over 100 shows for Celebrations. By now, the author of send-ups like E.T. Go Home has a pretty good idea what type of movies do -- and don't -- lend themselves to musical theatre.

"Casablanca might work but Citizen Kane, probably not," Apostle says, using his iPad to scroll through a website called 100 Movies You Should See Before You Die. "Apocalypse Now? No. Psycho? Why not? Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid? We actually did one on that.

"But what I find is that it's much easier to take a comedy -- Blazing Saddles would be perfect -- and turn it into a musical, instead of something dark and sinister. Unless you're Sweeney Todd."

During the last 10 years, converting hit motion pictures into rousing toe-tappers has become increasingly popular. But for every runaway success like The Producers, there have been two or three duds (Hello, Legally Blonde).

It's too early to say if Rocky: The Musical will be a box office champ or chump. But in the meantime, here's a list of movies-turned-musicals that didn't exactly knock critics' socks off.

Barbarella

DAVE Stewart, ex of the British band Eurythmics, wrote the songs for Barbarella, a musical based on the 1968 science-fiction film of the same name. The show centres around the title character -- a scantily clad heroine who travels the galaxy in a bid to save Earth. The movie, which starred Jane Fonda, is a cult classic. The musical, not so much. It closed in January 2005 after an abbreviated run in Austria.

Showstoppers: I Want to be Like Fred Astaire, An Angel Has No Memory

Everyone's a critic: "The musical version of Roger Vadim's 1968 sci-fi camp-fest crash-landed at Vienna's Raimund Theater in a cheesy, awkward production..." "Stewart can't be faulted... after writing 200 songs in collaboration with Annie Lennox, the only direction to go is down."

Carrie: The Musical

WHO can forget the part in the movie Carrie when Sissy Spacek's character is doused with pig's blood at her high school prom? The creators of Carrie: The Musical wish they could. Every time the production crew tried to recreate that seminal scene onstage, the fake blood shorted out the lead actress's microphone, almost electrocuting her in the process.

Showstoppers: Ain't It a Bitch?, Out For Blood

Everyone's a critic: "Those who have the time and money to waste on only one Anglo-American musical wreck this year might well choose Carrie." "When was the last time you saw a Broadway song and dance about the slaughtering of a pig?"

Return to the Forbidden Planet

RETURN to the Forbidden Planet draws its inspiration from Forbidden Planet, a 1956 celestial romp starring Leslie "Don't call me Shirley" Nielsen. The production has been retooled a number of times since its debut in the 1980s. But it has always stayed true to its score -- a dose of early rock and roll, including chart-toppers like Great Balls of Fire, Wipe Out and Johnny B. Goode.

Everyone's a critic: "Quite possibly the worst musical ever written..." "It seems marooned in space."

Love Story

A doomed love affair involving a young woman battling leukemia doesn't sound too merry, Poppins. The original 1970 weep-fest starred Ali MacGraw as Jenny Cavalleri and Ryan O'Neal as Oliver Barrett IV. In the 2010 version, things kick off at Jenny's funeral. The tale of the couple's ill-fated romance is told -- and sung -- through a series of flashbacks.

Showstoppers: Jenny's Piano Song, Pasta

Everyone's a critic: "If you like the original Love Story, you'll probably love this. If you loathe it, like me, you will just deplore the waste of so much genuine talent."

Urban Cowboy: The Musical

PAGING John Travolta! Urban Cowboy: The Musical closed on Broadway after just 60 shows. Despite scathing reviews, the play managed to score a Tony Award nomination for choreography. But in a major upset, it lost in the category Best Performance by a Mechanical Bull.

Showstoppers: Boot Scootin' Boogie, The Devil Went Down to Georgia

Everyone's a critic: "Vulgar and bland." "A musical whose creators weren't quite ready to get on the horse."

Bring It On: The Musical

RAH, rah, siss-boom-bah! The cheerleader epic Bring It On has spawned four cinematic sequels since it first leaped across movie screens in 2000. Last year, a musical version of the teen flick premièred in Atlanta, Ga. Listed among the cast were "award-winning, competitive cheerleaders from across the country." (We're not sure what this means but after it was announced that Bring It On: The Musical was coming to Los Angeles, a ticket-buyer there posted a message, saying, "My gay dreams have been answered.")

Showstoppers: What I Was Born To Do, Cross the Line

Everyone's a critic: "Stylistically confused and not-ready-for-Broadway..." "Soupy ballads with no unifying tone..."

A Clockwork Orange

A DECADE before Bono and the Edge turned their attention to your friendly neighbourhood Spider-Man, the U2-sters penned the score for a musical motivated by Stanley Kubrick's A Clockwork Orange. Sorry, Gene Kelly fans, the duo didn't include Singing in the Rain in the mix. Nor were they able to come up with a word that rhymes with "orange."

Everyone's a critic: "A clockwork lemon."

Giant Killer Shark: The Musical

"WARNINGS: Language, Gunshots, Blood Spatter"

Although Giant Killer Shark: The Musical reeled in audiences wherever it went (the Winnipeg Free Press granted the show five out of five stars when it washed ashore at the 2007 Winnipeg Fringe Festival), Hollywood legal beagles weren't so agog. In order to distance the protagonists of their play from those in Jaws, the writers of Giant Killer Shark scaled things back a bit, going with names like Crazy Old Fisherman, Grizzled New York City Cop, and Hippie Scientist to identify their characters.

Showstoppers: Totally Sexy Nudie Swim Party! The Only Good Shark is a Dead Shark

david.sanderson@freepress.mb.ca

Republished from the Winnipeg Free Press print edition February 18, 2012 E1