Thinnest Ice Age movie yet still has message for us

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TWENTIETH CENTURY FOX The animals are on the move in Ice Age: Continentall Drift. (POSTMEDIA)

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THE one thing you have to remember about the whole Ice Age franchise is we kind of know how it all ends.

Woolly mammoths (Mammuthus primigenius), sabre-toothed tigers (Smilodon) and even giant apes (Gigantopithecus) are all extinct. They lost the great evolutionary race, which means most of the central characters in this now four-deep franchise are doomed, even if the folks at Fox are determined to keep them alive for another few dodges of Darwin's bullet.

It's a tad sad to think about Manny (Ray Romano), Ellie (Queen Latifah) and Peaches (Keke Palmer) moving toward a dead end, but in some ways, it lends this family-oriented fluff an edge of pathos, and turns Manny the daddy mammoth into a prehistoric Willy Loman.

Not that it's palpable, or premeditated, or anything.

But when the movie opens with Scrat, the sabre-toothed squirrel, chasing an acorn to the centre of the Earth -- which in turn causes a seismic ripple that fragments the crust and sets new continents adrift -- we know it's the end of the world as the woollies knew it.

Making things even more stressful for the doomed species: The cataclysm happens at a rather delicate time in the mammoth household, just as daughter Peaches discovers the allure of peer approval, and a cute boy's gaze.

Peaches steals off to see her new friends just as the land shivers, shakes and splits apart beneath her massive feet. A few moments of paternal heroism later, Peaches and Ellie are shuffling towards a land bridge as a mountain moves toward them. Meanwhile, Manny and his two best friends are left stranded on a chunk of floating ice.

Will Manny ever be reunited with his pachyderm family?

In the big picture, it's hard to really care because -- as I said up top -- we know how it all goes down: Badly.

But the viewer is given a chance to see what makes life meaningful for all creatures sentenced to a mortal window -- and the results are both entertaining and life affirming.

Not only are we treated to the timeless beauty of altruistic parental love, we're offered lessons in the importance of true friendship as well as the adrenalin rush of romance -- whether it's for a member of your own species, or the fruit of a nut-bearing tree.

All the goofiness is supposed to add up to a heart full of gold, but this may be the thinnest Ice Age movie to date.

The script fails to generate much tension and has a cheap habit of copying other cartoon material. For instance, why does the giant ape -- voiced, in a beautifully ironic twist, by little person Peter Dinklage (Game of Thrones) -- have to be a pirate?

Sure, the growling guy with a patch is a sturdy villain to yank from central casting, but the previous Ice Age movies made some attempt to strike a novel chord, given they're set against a prehistoric backdrop where hominids had yet to ascend to the top of the food chain.

This movie decides to turn an iceberg into a Spanish galleon and make Jennifer Lopez a sexy sabre-toothed tiger fighting for the other side.

With so many tired cinematic chromosomes in the mix, it's no surprise this whole movie feels like something about to reach its final generation.

Oddly enough, that does prove to be its one saving grace -- at least from an intellectual perspective, because there should be no doubt the family of mammoths are us. Manny, Ellie and Peaches have been conceived to embody the very essence of all humankind -- our flaws, egos and emotional elegance in a thick-but-thin skinned package.

Similarly, every side character represents a hint of individuality -- whether it's the newly introduced wacky Granny (Wanda Sykes), or the perpetually self-loathing sloth, Sid (John Leguizamo).

Every ill-fated creature on the screen represents a reflection of our world as it exists right now. The fact the filmmakers set these stories against the fossil record may suggest safe distance, but themes of extinction feel awfully close these days, allowing this weak effort to find some traction in the slush of deja-vu.

-- Postmedia News

Other voices

Selected excerpts from reviews of Ice Age: Continental Drift.

It's familiar, drawn-out shtick, and the humour lacks the subtlety of the first and best Ice Age, but there are some visually inventive high points.

-- Megan Lehmann, Hollywood Reporter

Kids will enjoy themselves and adults won't feel the urge to spend the duration hiding out in the restrooms. Some of the jokes are funny.

-- James Berardinellil, ReelViews

Frivolous fun.

-- Derek Adams, Time Out

The earth shakes and nothing changes

-- Vadim Rizov, Boxoffice magazine

This feels like a rudderless ship of ice floating in tropical waters.

-- Anton Bitel, Film4

This isn't just the fourth silver screen outing for "history's greatest heroes." It's the Ice Age gang's most action-packed film to date.

-- Graham Young, Birmingham Mail

It's not very clever, but it's good fun.

-- Rich Cline, Shadows on the Wall

The wit and charm of the series' earlier entries, and much of their visual splendour, appears to have evaporated.

-- Shaun Munro, What Culture

As with last year's joyful Rio, Ice Age still looks more like a classic cartoon than its competitors. And that, at least, is impressive.

-- Ed Gibbs, The Sun Herald

I hate to be the one to break it to everyone... but it's time these animals were put to sleep.

-- Matthew Toomey, ABC Radio Brisbane

-- Compiled by Shane Minkin

Movie Review

Ice Age: Continental Drift

Featuring the voices of Ray Romano, John Leguizamo and Denis Leary

Grant Park, Kildonan Place, Polo Park, St. Vital, Towne

G

94 minutes

Three stars out of five

Republished from the Winnipeg Free Press print edition July 14, 2012 D6