Winnipeg Free Press - PRINT EDITION

Haiku Horoscopes

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Aries (March 21 - April 19)

óè

There is a simple

Explanation for that noise:

Time-travelling dogs

Taurus (April 20 - May 20)

óè

Your online presence

Generates more interest

Than your real presence

Gemini (May 21 - June 20)

óè

Try to be more like

Your heroes and less like your

Quick napkin doodles

Cancer (June 21 - July 22)

óè

We all make mistakes

For example, I forgot

To predict your week

Leo (July 23 - Aug. 22)

óè

You will never live

A balanced life until you

Get off the trapeze

Virgo (Aug. 23 - Sept. 22)

óè

Take life one step at

A time -- first step, eat breakfast

Next, kill the werewolf

Libra (Sept. 23 - Oct. 22)

óè

Don't rely on the

Advice of others. See? You'll

Just get bad advice

Scorpio (Oct. 23 - Nov. 21)

óè

Admit you have a

Problem -- yes, that rabid wolf's

Part of the problem

Sagittarius (Nov. 22 - Dec. 21)

óè

Soon all your hard work

Will pay off, when I laugh at

How it won't pay off

Capricorn (Dec. 22 - Jan. 19)

óè

Green's not your colour

So, sorry that I dyed your

Skin green while you slept

Aquarius (Jan. 20 - Feb. 18)

óè

Don't stress out about

That blind date your friends set up

He's only killed once

Pisces (Feb. 19 - March 20)

óè

Think deeply about

What you really want in life

Maybe some nachos?

Republished from the Winnipeg Free Press print edition November 8, 2012 C2

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