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Winnipeg Free Press - PRINT EDITION
Haiku Horoscopes
Aries (March 21 - April 19)
óè
A delicious pie
Would really hit the spot, but
Archers don't like that
Taurus (April 20 - May 20)
óè
You will know you're a
Success when Bill Gates lifts the
Restraining order
Gemini (May 21 - June 20)
óè
The Dragons' Den will
Like your plan to kidnap a
Princess and hoard gold
Cancer (June 21 - July 22)
óè
If killing others
Is a crime, then you will have
A difficult week
Leo (July 23 - Aug. 22)
óè
You're too sensitive --
The best solution is to
Remove all your nerves
Virgo (Aug. 23 - Sept. 22)
óè
There are always two
Sides to a story: your side
And society's
Libra (Sept. 23 - Oct. 22)
óè
Take your act on the
Road -- that's the best place for a
"Chicken crossing" act
Scorpio (Oct. 23 - Nov. 21)
óè
Transit rates will rise
With current fares doubled to
Two souls per rider
Sagittarius (Nov. 22 - Dec. 21)
óè
You can learn a lot
About life by observing
How others don't die
Capricorn (Dec. 22 - Jan. 19)
óè
Get a haircut but
Get a fake job -- nobody
Tells you what to do
Aquarius (Jan. 20 - Feb. 18)
óè
Your novel about
Magical green creatures called
The "murfs" sounds awesome
Pisces (Feb. 19 - March 20)
óè
Your joke about how
You "approve this message" is
As fresh as ever
Republished from the Winnipeg Free Press print edition November 29, 2012 C2
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