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Winnipeg Free Press - PRINT EDITION
Haiku Horoscopes
Aries (March 21 - April 19)
óè
You may never learn
Where Waldo is, but do kill
Him upon first sight
Taurus (April 20 - May 20)
óè
Don't let common sense
Stop you from achieving your
Dream to run with knives
Gemini (May 21 - June 20)
óè
For legal reasons
I advise you to stay out
Of Taurus' way
Cancer (June 21 - July 22)
óè
The spirits of the
Trees are tracking how much you
Use toilet paper
Leo (July 23 - Aug. 22)
óè
The UFO you
Saw did not come from the stars
Just from the future
Virgo (Aug. 23 - Sept. 22)
óè
The mighty, bearded
God of mighty beards has heard
Your prayers for beards
Libra (Sept. 23 - Oct. 22)
óè
The Church of the Rock
Will turn out not to be as
Rockin' as you hoped
Scorpio (Oct. 23 - Nov. 21)
óè
One double-double
For me! No, not coffee -- two
Sets of twins, moron
Sagittarius (Nov. 22 - Dec. 21)
óè
Boost your confidence
By completing easy tasks
Before world-saving
Capricorn (Dec. 22 - Jan. 19)
óè
News flash! It turns out
Superman DID make money
Fighting S. Grundy!
Aquarius (Jan. 20 - Feb. 18)
óè
Your love of kittens
Has gone too far -- they cannot
Replace employees
Pisces (Feb. 19 - March 20)
óè
The worst has come to
Pass -- by which I mean you have
Passed all of your tests
Republished from the Winnipeg Free Press print edition February 21, 2013 C2
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