STONY MOUNTAIN -- It would be, for most people, impossible. But somewhere deep inside them, Roberta and Rick James knew their family needs them to carry on without blame.
Just two days after their beloved 15-year-old boy, Andrew, died after being buried in hot asphalt at a construction site in Stony Mountain, the couple has a message of love for the family friend who ran the paving company, Interlake Asphalt Paving, where their son worked.
The parents (second and third from left) of construction site accident victim Andrew James at the memorial erected near where he died, with family and friends.
The couple, who have three other children, said they wholeheartedly supported Andrew's work at the paving company. They want no criminal charges or fines pressed against the company or their friend.
"It was a horrible, terrible freak accident," said Roberta James.
She said she believes her son was gone "instantly" and didn't suffer.
"We want to let the world know, and everybody know, who are trying to find someone to blame, there is no one to blame," she added.
RCMP said the teen was helping to unload a truck Friday morning when he was buried beneath a large pile of steaming asphalt. There were unconfirmed reports that a latch on the truck was faulty. RCMP and Manitoba Workplace, Safety and Health continue to investigate.
Andrew, a towering teenager who had attention deficit disorder, had begged his parents to let him work as a paver -- even though youths under 16 aren't allowed to work at construction sites in Manitoba.
Sunday night, Roberta James wore a blazing red T-shirt bearing the name of the asphalt company where she occasionally worked side-by-side with her son, as a second job, in addition to being a hotel worker.
Her husband, a construction worker, has also done work for the company. The couple said the owner badly injured himself when he tried to dig their son out of the hot asphalt.
"We want to let everyone know we're behind him," said Roberta James. "One day, we want to get back out there, and we'll probably be the first ones to be back working with him."
They said they are desperate to see him return to work when he's recovered.
"Even though we know (the owner) did nothing wrong at all, we know he's going to have guilt. And I know he will, and that's why we've got to stick behind him and help him get through that feeling... He needs to heal both physically and emotionally, and we do. We are behind (the owner) 100 per cent. We'll do whatever we have to now."
Roberta James said her son's nickname at the paving company was "wood tick," because he circled the job site so consistently on his bicycle, and workers affectionately likened him to a pest who wouldn't leave.
A boy who was gifted with his hands but "hyperactive" in behaviour, his parents said Andrew began disassembling motors at the age of nine.
He then moved onto more manual work for petty cash, including shovelling and mowing neighbourhood lawns in his close-knit community.
Already taller than his father at age 15, his parents said Andrew was an avid self-taught snowboarder who couldn't sit still.
Andrew got pleasure out of hard work. He had a passion for raking rocks out of sand, or clearing an area with a backhoe.
"(Andrew) went there and they couldn't get rid of him," she said.
"Most of the men working in the asphalt industry wouldn't know half of what he knew about the industry. He could drive every piece of equipment. Not just that, but he could fix every piece of equipment, which he had to do many times."
Added Rick James: "He drove that bike back and forth, asking, 'Can I get you water? Can I get you a shovel? Do you need me to sweep?'"
On Thursday, Roberta James took Andrew out for a belated birthday dinner to mark his 15th birthday last Tuesday. The next morning, she kissed him goodbye and he headed down the road to work for the paving company operator that Roberta James likens to a second father for her late son.
"I went off to work, and he left five minutes after. I told him, 'Have a good day at work, son.' And he said, 'Yeah, you too, Mom.' And that was it," said Roberta James.
"He was a 30-year-old man trapped in a 15-year-old kid's body.... That's why we allowed him to go help (the owner) all the time, because we knew how safe he was, and how much he loved Andrew. He would never, ever in this lifetime do something to put Andrew in harm's way."
That day, RCMP officers showed up at the hotel where she works in Winnipeg to tell her that her oldest son was dead.
She and her husband went to find their two daughters, Sabrina Ellison, 21, and Tiffany James, 18, who also live together in Stony Mountain to tell them about Andrew.
So close-knit is Stony Mountain that co-workers at the restaurant where Tiffany works kept her preoccupied until RCMP and her parents could give her the bad news.
Andrew's grandparents drove by the accident scene, saw the hair of the man under the asphalt, and lamented his fate before driving away. They had no idea it was Andrew buried underneath.
The family said they want to tell parents and children to be affectionate with each other.
Sunday night, Matthew James, Andrew's nine-year-old brother, wore a necklace belonging to his brother around his neck, cuddling with his sisters.
Rick James said his son's death has given him perspective on how to help his family shoulder grief: "It's like the way I told my friend when someone close to her passed away. Time will stand still for that person for that tragedy, but the rest of the world will keep going. Our family will lose time for a few minutes, but the reality is, you have to keep going. You have to keep going. You have to keep going.
"And we'll catch up to the rest of the world."
gabrielle.giroday@freepress.mb.ca
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