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Should have been listening, Tiger

Pastor who officiated at Woods' wedding does his best to impart a bit of wisdom

Posted: 02/8/2010 11:33 AM | Comments: 0 (including replies)

BARBADOS -- "Remember these four phrases," Pastor Ricky Kirton says, vestments flapping in the wind. "I was wrong. I am sorry. Please forgive me. I love you."

It's the same advice he gave Tiger Woods and Elin Nordegren.

In an exclusive interview, the local preacher who performed Woods' wedding ceremony remembers the golfer and his estranged wife as "very charismatic, very attractive."

Kirton officiated at the couple's 2004 nuptials. His name was never publicly revealed, part of the veil of secrecy over the famous golfer's wedding.

Kirton, sitting in the lobby of the luxury hotel, Almond Beach Village, says he treated the Woods wedding as he would any other.

"I basically use four key ideas," he says. "Communication, being able to trust each other, then forgiveness and putting the past away. I look at love and encourage them to show their love in words and deeds.

"I encourage them to keep courting each other. Send a card out of the blue or bring some flowers."

The Woods' marriage has been revealed as rocky since a car crash outside his home in November. In December, he lost some corporate sponsors after admitting he was unfaithful to Elin.

On Friday, Us Weekly reported Woods had left a Mississippi sex rehab clinic accompanied by his wife.

He has not been seen publicly since confessing his affairs.

The couple was married at Barbados' swanky Sandy Lane resort. The estimated cost of the wedding was somewhere between $1.5 million and $2 million.

Streets were closed and traffic redirected on the Caribbean island, much to the annoyance of many locals.

One tourism official said the wedding preparations were unlike anything she'd ever seen. No expense was spared. Hundreds of roses were imported. The entire Sandy Lane complex, with its 110 rooms and three golf courses, was rented. The rooms reportedly cost $700 to $9,000 a night each.

Kirton, a Church of the Nazarene pastor, is not paid by the betrothed. They can make a donation to his small church if they're so inclined. He won't say whether Woods did so.

Kirton performed 273 weddings last year -- a handful at his own parish and the remainder at the Almond resort's three properties. He is a hotel staff member.

He says he tries to meet his couples the day before the wedding for a bit of marriage counselling. They must spend 48 hours on the island before their ceremony.

If a couple wants to marry in his church, they must take three months of marriage preparation classes. That's optional when you're an island visitor. Woods and Nordegren did not sit down with the pastor for advice or counsel.

The 44-year-old Barbadian has been married -- "one wife, two kids" -- for 16 years. He wishes he had more time to spend with all the couples he marries.

"Most of the time I can't prepare them properly. I meet them initially and then I marry them. I find that when I talk to them, most of them take it to heart."

His services, many on the beach, average 10 minutes from opening remarks to the exchange of the rings.

"I tell them to remain true to the vows you have made, to guard well your bride and protect her. I want them to know this is serious and they have to work hard."

Asked if he is pained when a marriage fails, the pastor grows pensive.

"It's always painful," he says. "It doesn't matter who it is."

And then he's off to marry a lovely young couple from Toronto. They've chosen to have their ceremony under a white gazebo, the sea lapping in the background. She is stunning; he cries when he sees her. As a throng of sightseers in damp bathing suits watch from their lounge chairs, Kirton sanctifies their marriage.

When the Woods' marriage shattered amid accusations of infidelity and the flinging of golf clubs, it was not because Ricky Kirton didn't do his utmost to impart wisdom and guidance.

"I wish them well," he says. "I wish them well."

lindor.reynolds@freepress.mb.ca

Republished from the Winnipeg Free Press print edition February 8, 2010 On7

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