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Ahh, Venice -- NOT!

I'm way past feeling sorry for Taylor Swift about her love life, but this is sad: Some time ago she booked a trip to Venice to celebrate the 19th birthday, next month, of boy-band lad Harry Styles. Then they split.

I wonder if she'll find a new boyfriend to go with. It sounds like quite a holiday: five nights at the Palazzina Grassi on the Grand Canal, limousines, and of course their own gondola.

Nameless Insider told the paper that Taylor also bought him some other gifts: Beatles memorabilia as previously reported, and also some duds from Savile Row.

Also, she's stopped using the designer purse he gave her.

She's 23.

Winning, grandpa-style

CHARLIE Sheen, grandpa. His daughter Cassandra Estevez, who keeps herself right out of the limelight, is expecting her first child, Sheen's ex-wife Denise Richards tweeted. Cassie's mom is Charlie's high-school sweetie, Paula Profit.

Charlie is 47. Cassandra is 28 -- four years older than Charlie's current main girlfriend, porn performer Georgia Jones.

Don't want to miss a thing, eh?

IT'S all over between wrinkly old Steven Tyler and sweet young (well, relatively) Erin Brady. Neither lovebird's family had disguised its dismay about this match; both sides will be very relieved.

They'd been dating for five years when Steve proposed on Christmas Day 2011, but things just sort of deteriorated in recent months.

They had a wee tiff in October but evidently patched it up, but "it's over for good this time," Don't UsemyName told the New York Post. "They're still friendly but they're going their own ways."

He's 64. She's 39.

Kelly vs. Kelly

WHILE I'm on the subject of break-ups, it's my sad duty to report the pending divorce of Kelly Hildebrandt and Kelly Hildebrandt.

You read that right. He-Kelly is from Texas, she-Kelly is from Florida. They met via Facebook -- you can see how that would happen -- and married in 2009. He moved.

Now he has gone back to Texas, alone. And how pathetic is this: they're not even Facebook friends any more.

Something's gotta give

SOMETHING tells me Lady Gaga just earned herself another appearance on Fashion Police, the mean-spirited-and-therefore-amusing Joan Rivers-Kelly Osbourne TV show. Gaga's been complaining about the show being too negative, as I reported the other day.

Onstage in Vancouver last Friday night, it turns out, the Gagster managed to split her black latex Versace pants when she jumped onto a motorcycle while doing her ditty Heavy Metal Lover. She just kept right on singing.

She's 26.

Megan not sweet on tweets

NOT every celeb loves Twitter. Megan Fox, it turns out, bailed after just 10 days.

She acquired over 250,000 followers in a week after signing up Jan. 3, but then killed the account, a fact she announced via Facebook: "I thought that 2013 might be the year that I finally blossomed into a social networking butterfly, but as it turns out, I still hate it."

"Love you guys but I will just never be that girl. Facebook is as much as I can handle. I'm sorry."

She's 26.

... in other Fox news

MEGAN Fox explains, in Esquire mag, the hell of celebrity:

"I don't think people understand. They all think we should shut the (bad word) up and stop complaining because you live in a big house or you drive a Bentley. So your life must be so great. What people don't realize is that fame, whatever your worst experience in high school, when you were being bullied by those ten kids in high school, fame is that, but on a global scale, where you're being bullied by millions of people constantly."

Knitting is Ryan's fancy

SO, do we think Ryan Gosling was joking when he told GQ Australia that he loves to knit?

"I did this scene in Lars and the Real Girl... in a room full of old ladies who were knitting," he said, "and it was an all-day scene, so they showed me how. It was one of the most relaxing days of my life. If I had to design my perfect day, that would be it. And you get something out of it at the end. You get a nice present. For someone who wants an oddly shaped, off-putting scarf."

More cheese please

YET another reason to hate Gwyneth Paltrow: she reckons she doesn't need to do a January diet or anything like that.

"I am not on a detox," she told the Telegraph. "I am not on a diet. I know, New Year's cleansing and all that -- not this year. Can't do it -- maybe later in the year... For now, I would like to continue with my pasta and cheese."

She's 40.

A-Rod's house of pain

SO why did New York Yankee baseball player Alex Rodriguez take his $38-million Miami mansion off the market, after trying for months to sell the place?

Well, says the New York Post, quoting good old Don't Usemyname, apparently A-Rod is trying to get fit to play, after an injury-plagued 2012, and "doesn't want to have any distractions."

So I guess there's nothing distracting, then, about being stuck with a $38-million white elephant. Good to know.

He's 37.

An unwanted side effect

ROONEY Mara, out plugging a new thriller called Side Effects (also starring Channing Tatum, Jude Law and Catherine Zeta-Jones) tells Vogue mag that she doesn't like the whole red carpet deal:

For her picture The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo, "I had eight different premieres, this many different photo calls. It's a lot to plan for. It's not like you can just show up... it's kind of an annoying part of the job because I'm not a model, and I don't want to be."

Brit actors don't count?

WASN'T it just last week that Jessica Chastain was saying she wouldn't date any more actors? So what's she doing with this British guy Tom Hiddleston, who you will recall played Loki in The Avengers and was in War Horse?

In fact, says the Daily Mail's source, "Tom is taken with Jess and it's serious. Before Christmas she visited Britain to stay with him and meet all his family for the first time."

She's 35. He's 31.

Republished from the Winnipeg Free Press print edition January 20, 2013 ??65524

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