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My turn as celebrity chef a stirring moment indeed

By: Doug Speirs

Posted: 04/16/2012 1:00 AM | Comments: 0

I suspect, what with the crisis in Syria and the Stanley Cup playoffs in full swing, most of you are dying to know how I made out in the big Celebrity Cook-off.

I'm referring here to a charity event held Thursday night at the Caboto Centre wherein Chrissy Troy from HOT 103, Father Sam Argenziano from Holy Rosary Church, Breakfast Television co-host Drew Kozub and I duked it out in the culinary equivalent of a European soccer riot.

The way it worked was each celebrity chef was paired with a professional chef and the teams had 90 minutes to whip up an appetizer and a main course from a "black box" of mystery ingredients, which turned out to be three raw chickens the size of regulation basketballs.

I would say this event, a fundraiser for the Italian centre and Siloam Mission, was just like cooking in the comfort of your own kitchen, other than the fact we were all sweating like Mike Tyson at a Grade 3 spelling bee because we were trapped on a stage under hot lights with approximately 400 wine-swilling audience members watching and shouting helpful culinary tips such as: "Hey, try not to cut your fingers off!"

I was fortunate enough to be partnered with an awesome cook named Darryl Crumb, who, along with being the talented executive chef of Brooklynn's Bistro on Lombard Avenue, was one of the stars on the first season of the Food Network's hit reality show, Top Chef Canada.

The general idea of the evening was the "celebrities" were supposed to do all the actual cooking under the guidance of the professional chefs.

Fortunately, Darryl and I worked out a more practical system wherein he was responsible for all the chopping, slicing, julienning, Frenching, sauteeing, flambeing, garnishing, menu preparation, and putting things into ovens and taking them back out.

I was assigned the vital task of carrying out the bulk of our team's stirring, which you probably think sounds pretty darn easy, but that is only because you are not a seasoned chef like me.

We made a truffle and mixed wild mushroom risotto with roasted chicken thighs.

My contribution consisted of standing there stirring the rice around and around while audience members wandered over, watched me sweat for several minutes, then remarked: "You know, Doug, you were doing the same thing when I walked by 30 minutes ago."

The highlight of the night came when, like an NHL enforcer hammering one of the Sedin twins, I raced out of one of the kitchen's two swinging doors and -- WHAM! -- walloped a lovely woman who had been innocently attempting to carry a tray of coffee cups to her table. "Oops!" is what I grunted as I bravely ducked back in the kitchen.

In the end, Darryl and I became good buddies and he said he would hire me if I ever quit my day job because, and I will quote him directly, "you listen well to direction. Tell your wife you are very eager to please."

The night's big winner was Chrissy Troy, a serious foodie, who was teamed with chef Cameron Huley from DeLuca's.

"I feel so thankful," Chrissy told me later. "I learned to de-bone a chicken and I also learned you can take a motor from a fish tank and use it to whip up a balsamic vinegar foam."

For me, defeat tasted a tad bitter because I'd spent days shamelessly boasting about how I was going to win. As it turns out, that's just the way the cook crumbles.

doug.speirs@freepress.mb.ca

Republished from the Winnipeg Free Press print edition April 16, 2012 A2

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