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Steel yourself; sequel already on way

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333Hmmm. In the old days, a studio used to wait until a movie opened, and did really well, before announcing a sequel. Now they're making these things two and three at a time, and announcing sequels way in advance. Either movies are getting better -- not a premise I'd bet on, myself -- or audiences are getting more predictably bovine and complacent.

The 'good' old days

IN a Guardian feature marking the new Black Sabbath album with Ozzy Osbourne, band members wax nostalgic for the days when they were young and strong and stupid.

Here's a taste, from guitar man Tony Iommi:

"We were young blokes, doing what young blokes do. Nobody could control anyone else. I was doing coke left, right, and centre, and Quaaludes, and God knows what else. We used to have (our cocaine) flown in by private plane."

So bad it's... still bad

SETH Rogen pretty much admitted, on some podcast the other day, that some modern movies are pretty awful, are made that way, and the makers know it.

On a podcast called Doug Loves Movies, Huffington Post recounts, Rogen told the truth about The Guilt Trip, a picture he made last year with Barbra Streisand. Expectations were low:

"We shot that movie in the format that plays on airplanes only" he said, laughing. "They were like, 'Talk loud because the engine will be roaring... You've got to talk over the engine; there's announcements early on in the flight. You've got to take that into consideration.'"

Rogen couldn't stop laughing, which unfortunately cannot be said of the flick's audience, airborne or other.

This one won't

Carrey on

BUT maybe movies aren't doomed. In a refreshing triumph of standards, however low, Warner Bros. has (have?) scuttled plans for a sequel to the aptly named 1994 Jim Carrey starrer Dumb and Dumber.

But look again: This is about money, not quality: the project, which has been kicking around for years, died because Carrey's latest movie, The Incredible Burt Wonderstone, sank like a stone in March, says The Hollywood Reporter.

Coach caught with pot

UNDER terms of the Important Persons Act, Good Charlotte frontman Joel Madden will not face any drug charges, although cops reportedly found some marijuana in his apartment in Sydney, Australia.

He's down there being a coach on their version of The Voice. A cleaner dropped a dime after seeing a green leafy substance. Cops, with nothing better to do, tossed Joel's furnished apartment. In a statement, he admitted that it was indeed wacky tabaccky, adding "I hope this didn't cause too much drama for anyone."

No charges, but he has been asked to leave the hotel, local media said.

He's 34.

Going for Bjrk

-- we've got pictures

ROBERT Pattinson and Katy Perry?

Wait, what? The last we heard, Katy was all but moved in with John Mayer. But now the Sun (the overseas one) claims she and Pattinson have moved beyond good-friend status; he stayed at her L.A. home for a week, they went to a Bjrk concert together, etc, They are "now planning a romantic Caribbean summer getaway," says the Sun.

I dunno. That's a pretty serious allegation, to suggest that somebody went to a Bjrk gig. But there are pix, so ...

She's 27. He's 28.

Better deal

for Biel?

JESSICA Biel, not happy with the movie roles she's been getting, has fired her manager and publicist, says Deadline Hollywood.

She's been working steadily, but mainly in "interesting little movies" -- the kind nobody sees. Being married to Justin Timberlake, no doubt she's feeling eclipsed.

Jessica has signed to be managed by LBI, the company that also makes Justin's career work. She's 31.

Trouble in

Riverdale city

ARCHIE and Betty and Veronica and Jughead and all on the big screen? I can't see it; can you?

You saw the story? Warner Bros. has signed with the comics people to make a live-action movie. No casting yet.

I grew up a fan -- who didn't? -- but there is, I think, a reason this has never been done before (except for a best-forgotten made-for-TV movie in 1990). The Riverdale gang lives in imagination, not real life. No doubt the scriptwriter will make the story all socially relevant and thereby screw it up. You have been warned.

Republished from the Winnipeg Free Press print edition June 16, 2013 ??65524

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