Hey, what's with the long face, Winnipeg? Tell Uncle Doug what's bothering you.
OK, I get it. You're a little bummed out the Jets aren't doing as well as you'd like. And you're feeling emotionally fragile because the (bad word) price of beer has jumped about $2 for a 12-pack.
Most of all, you're sick of all the (extremely bad word) snow we've had this winter.
Well, guess what, Winnipeg? I have some good news and some bad news for you. The good news is -- and this is a scientific fact -- spring is definitely coming. The bad news is: It isn't coming this week.
In fact, you might want to grab a box of Kleenex and a family-sized jug of Tylenol, because chances are we'll get even more snow this week.
Speaking of which, my buddy Dale Marciski from Environment Canada sent me some statistics showing that, as of Thursday, we've had 143 centimetres of snow so far this winter, compared to the normal 87 cm, meaning we are at "164 per cent of normal at this point."
According to Dale, we typically get another 24 cm of snow through the rest of March and April, but he wasn't about to make a prediction on whether that will happen this year.
For the record, during the same period last winter, we had only 79 cm of snow, followed by a measly one cm the rest of the season, for a total of just 80 cm.
In the winter before that (2010-11), we had 129 cm at this point, followed by a further 20 cm in March, April and on May 1, for a total of 149 cm in the entire season.
Fortunately, there's no snow in the forecast for today, when we should see a mix of sun and clouds and a high of -4 C, just one degree colder than the normal high of -3 C. On Sunday -- YIKES! -- it will be sunny with a b-b-b-b-b-bracing high of -12 C. On Monday, however, there's a 60 per cent chance of flurries and there's a 30 per cent chance of more flurries on Thursday.
Before we are buried once again, I suggest you get out and have some fun this weekend at the big Manitoba RV Show & Sale at the convention centre featuring over 120,000 square feet of RVs, trailers, guest speakers and family fun, including jugglers. If they're juggling RVs, that will definitely be worth seeing.
Then hop in an RV and swing over to Red River Exhibition Park for the annual Cottage Country Show, where you can learn everything you'll need to know about cottage life, such as how to build a raft out of empty beer cans. OK, I was kidding about that last bit.
And I will bark at you if you don't make time today for Winnipeg Lost Dog Alert's first-ever awareness and fundraising event at Sprocketts Doggy Daycare, Unit 7-975 Thomas Ave. from 11 a.m.-6 p.m. There will be entertainment, hot dogs, pawdicures and a chance to meet rescue dog Dooley, who needs a few donations to help cover the cost of amputating a badly injured hind leg.
As for setting a snowfall record this winter, here's what Dale had to say: "The record snowfall for an entire season (late fall to spring) was in 1955-56 when we received 253 cm. So we are nowhere close to that record, thankfully."