I ran out of steam towards the end of the Christmas shopping season and sent my husband out the other night to pick up gift cards for my parents, brother and his girlfriend.
My husband will get the usual sweater. My kids have lists that they have been holding tight all week, so there shouldn’t be any surprises for them either.
I’ve said time and time again that I don’t want anything this year, because I already have so much, but my husband is insisting on putting a red bow on my new kitchen to remind me that Santa came a little early for me this year just the same.
So tonight I wrap, things. Lots of things I bought to show my family how much they all mean to me. A sweater means you are always there for me no matter what and every time I see you my heart warms up. A new collection of Thomas trains means I never want to look around my house and not see scratched hardwoods that remind me of how much I love you. A rocking horse means you can still jump on my tummy every morning saying "giddy up mommy" until you bore of me because I will never bore of you.
I will delicately wrap all of my presents this evening anticipating them being ripped open on Christmas day. The "I love you Santa!", the hours of playing and sharing, raw excitement, sugar rush, running around the house with cousins, going to sleep way past bedtime, waking up to a mess of dirty dishes and hours of clean up, finding toys, losing toys, buying replacement ones.
In the blink of an eye it will all be over with and I will anxiously look forward to another year filled with new adventures, challenges, accomplishments, setbacks and dreams. Tonight I will dream of my kids’ faces lighting up on Christmas morning, even if it is at 6 a.m. I’ll pretend like I’m tired and have them wait until the coffee is done brewing. I’ll look surprised and pleased that Santa ate all his cookies again this year. I’ll put on a stern face and insist everyone cleans up, shares toys and minds their manners.
And secretly, when no one is watching, I’ll enjoy seeing extra pastries being snagged from the dessert table, Dora cars running into dining room furniture and trains being smuggled off to bed. In short, I’ll be the happiest kid around.
Happy holidays everyone!