Doug Speirs

  • Soggy gitch no match for male brain

    I do not wish to unduly alarm anyone, but I recently survived a major household crisis. As so often happens with guys of my particular gender, this crisis involved underpants.
  • Trending that caught Doug's eye... heroic animals

    Move over, Kim Kardashian, because a heroic Russian cat is breaking the Internet. The remarkable tale of a stray cat named Masha has gone viral after the long-haired feline saved an abandoned baby from freezing to death by wrapping itself around the newborn to keep him warm.
  • Your weekend weather

    Do you know what's funny? Seriously, do you know what's laugh-out-loud, side-splittingly, makes-you-want-to-wet-yourself hilarious? Well, if you do, maybe you could tell me, because apparently I don't have a clue.
  • What's in a name? Plenty of mistakes, says Speers, er, Speirs

    Not that I am sensitive about this, but people routinely mangle my last name. I often get letters and email wherein I am addressed as "Mr. Spiers," "Mr. Speers," "Mr. Speeres," "Mr. Spears," or even "Mr. Speirce."
  • Waiter! Where's my popcorn?

    Call me a crusading journalist with fire in his eyes, but I recently did something so reckless and daring you will probably think I am making it up. I went to an actual movie in an actual movie theatre with my wife and some close friends.
  • Tending to robotic baby not exactly child's play

    I do not know what you did for fun on Friday evening, but I helped my buddy Bob engage in some modern parenting. What with being sensitive guys of our gender, we drove halfway across the city to watch Bob's youngest daughter, Linnea, a Grade 10 student at St. Mary's Academy, compete in a basketball tournament.
  • Your weekend weather

    Hand me a big box of tissues and grab a comfy seat by the fire, Winnipeg, because we need to expend mental energy thinking about our roller-coaster weather. For starters, you know how when you get the Killer Cold from Hell — such as the one I’ve been battling for weeks — and it drags on and on and on and, even when you finally overcome the virus, you’re so used to feeling lousy every day that your brain doesn’t recognize you’re starting to get better?
  • Trending that caught Doug's eye: NHL snipers

    Most of us weren't there Tuesday night when Winnipeg Jets left-winger Mathieu Perreault used his stick to write a new chapter in local hockey history. We personally were stretched out on the couch in our den suffering from the Gastrointestinal Illness from Hell when the roof was blown off MTS Centre as the plucky Perreault hit the back of the net four times, leading the Jets to an 8-2 drubbing of the Florida Panthers.
  • A little slice of Europe

    It's difficult, using mere words, to describe the incredible stress of being a modern newspaper columnist, but I will give it a shot: It is very stressful! For instance, one moment you are parked in front of your computer, innocently counting the ceiling tiles over your head and trying to come up with a column topic; and the next moment some heartless editor has ordered you to drop everything and expose your 58-year-old body to all the delights a brand-new, $11-million spa has to offer.
  • Beer guts, zombies and Tootsie Pops

    In a modern democracy, where every human being is valued equally, who among us is powerful and hip enough to decide which fleeting societal trends will become wildly popular and which will be summarily kicked to the curb? As regular readers know, I am. Which is my humble way of saying it is time, once again, for Uncle Doug's annual super-cool guide to what's in and what's out for the new year, starting with...
  • Trending that caught Doug's eye: Best-dressed men

    You will find this hard to believe, but once again we did not make the list. We are referring here to men's magazine British GQ's annual list of the 50 best-dressed men in the United Kingdom.
  • Your weekend weather

    You want to know what's (bad word) cold? I'd be happy to tell you what's (bad word) cold! What's (bad word) cold is driving a huge ice-resurfacing machine at breakneck speed along the Red River Mutual Trail at The Forks into the teeth of a soul-destroying Arctic wind when you are not wearing a pair of high-grade long underwear.
  • Heartsick for Toby and 'The Girl'

    The post-Christmas blues are definitely taking a toll at our house. This is especially true of our emergency backup dog, Mr. X, a small furry white creature that looks like the result of an experiment involving the mating of a cotton swab with a throw pillow.
  • Goodbye, Michael Rodent's

    I wandered into my favourite store the other morning to do a bit of post-Christmas browsing and got smacked in the face with some tragic news. When I strolled into Michael Rodent's Bath & Kitchen Accessories at 562 Academy Rd., I found owner Larry Jensen in the midst of a huge liquidation sale.
  • Cufflinks nearly a casualty of ballet

    I will always remember this brutally cold holiday season as the Christmas of the Missing Cufflink. It began in mid-December when my great-Auntie Ann called from Vancouver to inform me that my late beloved great-uncle Danny, who we lost back in 2010, would have wanted me to have his solid-gold monogrammed cufflinks.
  • Your weekend weather

    Grab a snow shovel and a family-sized container of extra-strength Advil, Winnipeg, because it's time for our first weekend weather forecast of 2015. For those of you who are still trying to recover from New Year's Eve, here's what you need to know -- it's going to be teeth-rattling, bone-chilling, soul-destroying cold.
  • Trending that caught Doug's eye... favourite holiday tunes

    You can't escape them at this festive time of year. No matter where you go -- the nearest shopping mall, an elevator, your car, in front of the TV in the den -- your ears are going to be assaulted by a never-ending barrage of Christmas carols.
  • Your weekend weather

    As anyone who has seen the graceful way I pirouette around the frozen-food aisle at Safeway will tell you, I was born to dance. In fact, you can check out some of my sweet ballet-style moves right now by using the Blippar app on your smartphone to scan this page, or by visiting winnipegfreepress.com to check out our latest weekend weather video.
  • Drooling over bacon-type gifts

    The last thing I wanted to do was pick another fight with the vegetarian community this close to Christmas, but I think you'll agree I had no choice. As regular readers are aware, angry vegetarians, some of them brandishing large stalks of broccoli, have been ganging up on me recently because they are irate over my journalistic habit of writing columns in which I gush about my love of all things bacon.
  • Pooches can upset a holiday

    It's starting to sound a lot like Christmas around our place. Take the other morning, for instance, when I was shocked awake by a shriek of anguish coming from our living room.
  • Festive fundraiser a boon for pet lovers and local animal shelter

    There's great news for animal lovers -- it's time to deck the halls with puppies and kitties. You can get your home ready for the holidays by getting your paws on festive dog- and cat-themed wreaths being sold to raise funds for D'Arcy's ARC (animal rescue centre).
  • Making a statement: Trending that caught Doug's eye

    Sometimes it's about more than just a game. Sometimes it's about what's going on in your community and around the world.
  • Your weekend weather

    ’Tis the season to make a joyful noise, Winnipeg, so put down your newspapers and repeat the following chant of sincere thanks: “All hail El Niño! All hail El Niño!” We are feeling especially warm and fuzzy today because David Phillips, Environment Canada’s legendary senior climatologist, just informed us we will bask in unseasonably warm temperatures thanks to our first taste of the global weather phenomenon known as El Niño.
  • 'Tis the season for missing brains

    As most sensitive readers are aware, Christmas is a time for sitting quietly beside a roaring fire and contemplating some of the deepest mysteries of the universe. That's what I was trying to do over the weekend, although technically I was lying on the couch in the den watching professional football on our big-screen TV and eating ranch dip directly from the container.
  • Well-meaning maladroit injures self while giving cheer

    Just once, I'd like to hurt myself in a reasonably normal manner. You know, accidentally lopping off a finger while trying to slice tomatoes for a delicious BLT.

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