Winnipeg Free Press - PRINT EDITION

Close the curtains on nude dancer or go out and meet him

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DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: This young guy gets undressed in his bedroom with the window curtains wide open and the light on. I can see everything, and I can hear music playing while he dances around. He does it every night at midnight when I happen to be going to bed, too. I think he may be doing it on purpose to shock me. He's short, in his 20s, with a dark tan and built like an athlete. I wonder if he's a soccer player or maybe even a male dancer. He dances like one. Do you think this is a show to shock me, or a stupid, immature attempt at flirtation? I know I've seen him at university before. Should I put a note on his car and let him know I'm disgusted with what he's doing? -- Late Show Victim, St. Boniface

Dear Late Show Victim: The tone of your letter is excitement, not disgust. You know very well your curtains could be closed well before midnight, yet they're obviously open, too. Do you want to flirt back with this man by feigning disgust in a note? Not the best idea. Instead go down to the parking lot during the day when he's going to university and say innocently, "Hello, nice weather, isn't it?" and get a conversation going to find out what he's like. But be careful. He's a daring guy and there's a small chance he might be dangerous, not just young and mischievous. Take it slowly, with lengthening conversations in the parking lot, until you find out which it is.

 

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: Sorry to be a drag, but I am on the bottom of a mood swing that is keeping me from going to work. My boss thinks I have a terrible flu, but the truth is I just got dumped on my head by the love of my life. Why? Because I won't tolerate his drug use anymore. It's only pot, but it's every single day. He even smokes in the car before he gets to work. When he tried to quit, he became so angry and miserable I couldn't stand to be around him. What now? I have to get back to work. Should I get antidepressants? I am not suicidal. -- On the Bottom, Winnipeg

Dear Bottom: Before antidepressants, try this first: Get up, get dressed and force yourself to go back to work. You don't know how bad your depression can get until you lose your job and have no money on top of everything else. Ask your boss for more work if things are slow, or create and pitch a project you want to do. Try to find purpose and normalcy within those work walls while you get past the worst part of the breakup.

Get some free walk-in counselling at Klinic, which is offered most days of the week (call 204-784-4067 for hours). You can talk to their crisis line people 24/7 at 204-786-8686 if you are depressed. Also, push yourself out the door for a walking and running regimen. You need light and exercise to elevate your mood.

lovecoach@hotmail.com

Republished from the Winnipeg Free Press print edition October 18, 2013 D4

History

Updated on Friday, October 18, 2013 at 7:06 PM CDT: Corrects Klinic phone number.

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