Dear Miss Lonleyhearts: Too bad stupid, unwelcome Valentines like me can't get mushy cards back out of the mail. Last week I sent a Valentine's card to a great guy who broke up with me six months ago. Why, you might ask? Because I was a terrible workaholic. I scaled back at work and did everything to try to re-interest him in recent months, but he won't give me another chance.
So for this Valentine's season, I finally sent him a last-ditch, everything-you've-got card. I must confess I drank almost a whole bottle of red wine before I wrote the embarrassing poem that went inside. Then I put my fur coat on, and toddled to the mailbox before I lost my nerve. The next morning, I regretted mailing that red envelope very badly. I haven't heard back from him. Should I phone him and tell him to disregard the card? -- Besotted Idiot Valentine, River Heights
Dear Besotted: Don't contact this man again! You did get a reply to your mailed Valentine and poem -- zip, nada, nothing. He doesn't want to play. There will be no next move for him. This knight has walked away from the game. Hurting lovers are known to do dumb things, but six months down the line, it's time to quit. Forgive yourself for being silly and leave the poor guy alone now. He may still be worrying about an awkward booty call, or a tearful phone call on Feb. 14. Don't do it!
Go out with your girlfriends to dinner and a movie that night, and go straight home, having made a vow: Instead of obsessing about him, you'll keep on living a life of balance with room for a partner in it. When the cold weather breaks and romance is in the air for everybody, you'll go out looking for a guy who is brand new. Consider yourself "reborn in the world of romance" and don't look back.
Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: Although I've met them, I don't know the family who lives across the way well. They seem nice. The husband works in an office and the wife works at a hospital, sometimes during the evenings. One night a few months ago, I saw a woman go to their home and didn't think much about it when she arrived. She did catch my eye, though, because she was attractive and walked with confidence. When she left a couple of hours later, I noticed that her straight hair was wet and curly. Then I noticed the wife's car was not there.
I haven't seen the mystery woman since then, although I haven't been watching for her either. I know I'm making assumptions and it's none of my business, but I can't get this out of my mind. Should I talk to the husband or to the wife? -- Unsure, Fort Garry
Dear Unsure: You're so right. This is really none of your business. You don't even know this couple across the way. She may have been a visiting lover, as you hint, or she may be somebody's sister who came for a bath because the water wasn't running in her place. Did you see an erotic embrace? No! Are you curious? Yes, and overly imaginative.
Too bad this lady didn't have a hat with her; it must have been very cold outside with wet hair. Clearly she didn't care to hide herself under a hat. Maybe she didn't have anything to hide! It doesn't matter what the details are. You are altogether too watchful for your own good, so close those curtains and try to enjoy your own life.
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