DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: I'm crazy about curling and my husband hates it. I go to all kinds of curling events. He used to complain. Then he stopped. Last spring I found out he had a curling night affair bee-ach. I went over to her house and put a stop to that. She's scared of me now and he's started complaining about how much I curl again. I asked him to take lessons this fall and start curling with me, but he said he'd rather eat glass. I forgave him his affair and I don't even bring it up. You'd think he'd make an effort. He said tonight, "I might as well have another affair!" That made me nuts; I love the guy, but I can't quit curling. -- Curling Nut, Winnipeg
Dear Curling: There are many ways to have affairs and they're not always with other people. You're madly in love with curling and the curling lifestyle. This sport gives you so much pleasure you weren't as upset as most people would be over an affair. You just put a stop to it, and went back to regular life, and your curling schedule. If your man got enthused about skiing, would you go away on the weekends with him? No, you'd rather eat glass than miss curling. Can you accept he's probably angry enough to retaliate again, only this time be bolder about it? Sports widows and widowers from many sports, arts and charity activities contend with being left at home. Have any readers found a good way to handle the problem so both people are happy?
Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I found a love note in my live-in girlfriend's purse when I was looking for her keys. It was from a woman she works with. I had no idea my girl was bisexual. She mentioned a get together they were having that weekend, so I went to work where they were meeting up, driving in my buddy's truck and wearing a tuque. I saw them get into the other woman's car and kiss passionately. It didn't turn me on; it made me cry. Does this mean it's over? The other woman signed her note "Love forever." Should I say anything to my girlfriend? --Beaten? Elmwood
Dear Beaten: How can you not? You can't make this thing un-happen because you don't mention it. So say to your girlfriend today: "I saw the note and I saw you kissing so-and-so passionately at your work. What is the status of your relationship? You need to know the facts now. If she's planning on leaving you, it's best to know so you can make plans. If she's just messing around and doesn't love this woman back, is it good enough for you if she quits? Maybe cheating of any kind is a deal-breaker for you, and this will be it. Your gut will know after she talks about it.