Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I thought I'd ask you how you would assess this. Former Miss Universe Canada contestant Jenna Talackova, born male but with gender confusion, has become as much a woman as surgically possible. She states about her new reality show (Brave New Girls): "I just hope I make it more socially acceptable for anybody that's different from society's kind of person... So I hope this show sends that message -- to accept people for who they are."
I'm of the opinion that Jenna has not and does not practise what she preaches. Jenna was not accepting of who she was and had surgery that could not ever make her truly female. Jenna was also not accepting of being anything but a Miss Universe and celebrity. So what are your thoughts? -- Confused but Logical
Dear Confused: Your letter barely conceals your sneer, so I'm asking you to open your mind for this answer: You are who you are, on the inside. Unlike you, Jenna Talackova had to work to match her outsides to her insides, but she was always a female person inside. With a great deal of courage, she has done a beautiful job. As for settling for whatever life deals you and not fighting for what you want and need, that is not an acceptance to be applauded, but lack of courage.
Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I'm a female, attending the same high school for years, so I know my way around. A lot of new students came in this year. One of the new female students is very strange around me. She will give me random, undeserved compliments and tries to sit near me in every class. For the first few months of school, I thought she was just trying to find a friend who knew the school, but she already has a strong clique. However, she still has a strange attachment to me. I am confused as to her intentions and how to deal with her. -- Perplexed, Manitoba
Dear Perplexed: Why do you have to "deal" with her? If she likes you, those are her feelings to deal with. You don't need to have it out with her, or be mean, or snub her. Just like a guy who seems to like you too much, you deal with her pleasantly and take it as a compliment, but don't initiate any deepening of the friendship. A confident person always thinks that someone who seems to like them has very good taste! There is no need to devastate someone who likes you.
Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: This is in response to the guy who took his girlfriend to a violent movie, and when she wanted him to drive her home in the middle, he handed her a bus ticket. I think these two young people are too selfish and immature to be dating at all. Neither knows how to behave. When a man takes a woman on a date, he is responsible for seeing her home safely. How would he feel if she had been raped or murdered on her way home alone? He doesn't seem to realize he is at fault here, blaming her for being "stubborn and stupid." He doesn't know how to treat a lady or how to behave like a gentleman.
She, on the other hand, behaved like a bossy little diva. She agreed to go into the movie and then decided she didn't like it. Her boyfriend had sat through her romantic comedies so, in fairness, she should have closed her eyes and ears and sat through his. She doesn't seem to know or care that it's rude to humiliate your date in front of others by creating a scene in the middle of a movie and demanding he jump because she said so. She should have quietly told him the violence bothered her and that she'd wait for him in the lobby. After a few uncomfortable moments without his date, he might have got up and driven her home.
Both of these kids sound too spoiled and inconsiderate to admit they were wrong. She's enjoying giving him the silent treatment and any letter he might write would be just to talk some sense into her. They both need to grow up. -- A Grown Up, Stonewall
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