DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: Five months ago, I met a strong, dominant woman who turned me around completely. She wanted me to try to act dominant in a sex scene and I am a very quiet, shy, gentle guy — a real geek, at the time. At first, I said I couldn’t, but then she taught me step-by-step and I began to feel empowered. Then she sent me to a personal trainer to work out. I changed inside and out, and gained 20 pounds of muscle. At my IT office this week, somebody asked me if I had grown taller or was wearing lifts in my shoes. I asked to be measured at my next weight lifting session — and was almost two inches taller. My trainer said it was because I had such a bad neck and shoulder stoop that I was never my full height in my whole life until now, which is 6-2. What this beautiful woman has done for me I can never repay. Who says power games are wrong or kinky? They gave me a pride in myself I never thought I’d have. I am going to marry this woman and I know she wants me.
Please tell other shy guys about this. — Standing Tall, Winnipeg
Dear Standing Tall: No one had to teach you how to be submissive, but you needed to learn the other side of human nature as well. I have no doubt your lady friend is able to switch roles as well. Congratulations on feeling so good about yourself — the key to a happy and successful life. "Fake it until you make it" is a powerful motto when trying to become something new. In your case you were taught to play the role of a strong dominant and ended up making it come true to the point where you are now tall and proud, and feeling the confidence that goes with the stance.
You also learned how to lead and command, which might not get you very far if you try to boss your superiors around at work, but can certainly enhance a scene in the bedroom.
Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I got into a fist fight with a guy I know over my girlfriend who he called some bad hooker names. Then I found out she actually was selling her body and I wished I hadn’t punched him out so bad his nose is bent for good. I would kind of like to say I’m sorry, but I’m afraid if he sees me up close he will punch my lights out. What would you do? — Too Fast to Fight, West End
Dear Too Fast: Let it get around that you found out what he said was true, but he still had no right to call down your woman. He will be less mad at you, knowing you are now suffering from knowing what your woman has been up to, yet he’s not close enough to beat you up for the unnecessarily bent nose. Though you owe him half an apology, it wouldn’t be wise to present yourself for a payback beating.
Dear Miss Scurfield: Your answer to the woman who complained that her husband wears no underwear under his beautiful suits, sucks.
That practice is totally unhygienic! Why did you berate the wife, accusing her of wanting to boss him around, when in reality he is the one who should change his disgusting habit! — G.M., Winnipeg
Dear G.M.: The practice of going commando under a suit may be bad for the suit, but not necessarily for the man. Women often don’t wear panties in the summer and the circulating air is actually good for them. Same for certain men and certain kinds of suits.