Winnipeg Free Press - PRINT EDITION

Get self-cleaning litter box if husband won't help scoop

  • Print

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: My husband won't clean the cat box. I know this may seem petty but it has caused a daily problem with us. He says it was my decision to get the cat because he doesn't like cats, so it's my chore to clean the box, which is a dirty job. He doesn't feed the cat -- ever. I do all the work and he sits around with the cat on his belly reading the newspaper and watching TV. They are best buddies. The cat sleeps curled up beside him. Whose cat do you think it is now? Kitty basically comes to me he wants food. How do I settle this so my husband does his half of the work? -- Cat Servant, St. Vital

Dear Servant: This problem won't go away with entreating, reasoning or guilting. Hubby isn't going to give in. So throw some money at this problem even if you buy the miracle yourself -- a self-cleaning litter box, but do ask him to chip in half. Don't give it to your husband for Christmas -- dirty tricks beget dirty tricks. Men often love mechanical innovations and you should mention with a smile it will be the end of the fighting. Get a big enough one and the kind that can operate on batteries as well as a plug-in, which will give you more options for placement in the house. The cat does business as usual. Then the mechanical scooping arm comes along 10 minutes after the cat has departed. Eureka!

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: You forgot to tell Not Quite Ready that he's kidding himself if he thinks he isn't hurting anyone. My husband is also a "pleasant alcoholic." He's been a very good provider, works around the house, is good with the kids and grandkids and supportive of my work and education dreams. But, I can't talk to him anymore because he can't remember what he said the night before when he was drinking. We don't go out in the evening because it cuts into his drinking. Most mornings, he doesn't smell great. Every day I dread what's happening to his mind and body. I'm terrified of spending the rest of my life alone... and just because Mr. Not Quite Ready (to quit drinking) paces himself before the kids go to bed, doesn't mean they don't know what he's doing. They know, but may not understand or be able to articulate their fears. Plus, if he's a single dad, he might want to consider the money he's dribbling away. Cheap wine at 10 bucks a bottle is $300-$600 a month. Maybe he could put that into education money for his kids instead, or a family vacation. -- Well-Acquainted With Problem, Manitoba

Dear Well-Acquainted: Children take in much more than they show, think about it and act on it. Some will emulate the addictive behaviour. Others will hate it and walk away as soon as they can. But, many adults and kids who are still dependent simply can't walk away, especially with the pleasant drunk. They still love dad or mom very much, drinking or not. Al-Anon/Alateen (943-6051) for people affected by another person's drinking, does a lot of good in helping people cope with alcoholics. The website for meeting times is

Questions or comments? Write Miss Lonelyhearts c/o Winnipeg Free Press 1355 Mountain Ave., Wpg, R2X 3B6, or email

Republished from the Winnipeg Free Press print edition December 13, 2011 D4

Fact Check

Fact Check

Have you found an error, or know of something we’ve missed in one of our stories?
Please use the form below and let us know.

* Required
  • Please post the headline of the story or the title of the video with the error.

  • Please post exactly what was wrong with the story.

  • Please indicate your source for the correct information.

  • Yes


  • This will only be used to contact you if we have a question about your submission, it will not be used to identify you or be published.

  • Cancel

Having problems with the form?

Contact Us Directly
  • Print

You can comment on most stories on You can also agree or disagree with other comments. All you need to do is be a Winnipeg Free Press print or e-edition subscriber to join the conversation and give your feedback.

You can comment on most stories on You can also agree or disagree with other comments. All you need to do is be a Winnipeg Free Press print or e-edition subscriber to join the conversation and give your feedback.

Have Your Say

New to commenting? Check out our Frequently Asked Questions.

Have Your Say

Comments are open to Winnipeg Free Press print or e-edition subscribers only. why?

Have Your Say

Comments are open to Winnipeg Free Press Subscribers only. why?

The Winnipeg Free Press does not necessarily endorse any of the views posted. By submitting your comment, you agree to our Terms and Conditions. These terms were revised effective April 16, 2010.


Make text: Larger | Smaller


Jets fans take Anaheim by storm

View more like this

Photo Store Gallery

  • Geese fly in the morning light over Selkirk Ave Wednesday morning- Day 22– June 13, 2012   (JOE BRYKSA / WINNIPEG FREE PRESS)
  • A baby Red Panda in her area at the Zoo. International Red Panda Day is Saturday September 15th and the Assiniboine Park Zoo will be celebrating in a big way! The Zoo is home to three red pandas - Rufus, Rouge and their cub who was born on June 30 of this year. The female cub has yet to be named and the Assiniboine Park Zoo is asking the community to help. September 14, 2012  BORIS MINKEVICH / WINNIPEG FREE PRESS

View More Gallery Photos


Do you agree with the sale of the Canadian Wheat Board to foreign companies?

View Results

View Related Story

Ads by Google