Winnipeg Free Press - PRINT EDITION

Can't you see he's just looking for a booty call?

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DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: I'm a little confused right now because I had a "thing" with a guy, and he had a "thing" for me, but then he got a girlfriend and they've been together for some time now. But suddenly, he's talking to me again and flirty. What are his intentions? I feel like he hasn't gotten over me, and I feel bad for his girlfriend. -- Confused, Winnipeg

 

Dear Confused: Telling yourself the poor guy hasn't gotten over you, is the first step towards opening the door to him at midnight. You have to know this guy's looking for a booty call -- and he thinks he can get it from you. Why? Because you've already entertained some sexy conversations with him. You don't really feel bad for his present girlfriend, or you wouldn't be allowing him to flirt with you. It would seem you're the one who hasn't gotten over him and you're about to put yourself into a situation that should be beneath you. Next time he calls looking for ego-stroking and a sandwich tryst between bouts with his real girlfriend, tell yourself to take a hike and hang up. Or, you could say, "Phone your girlfriend up before I do!" Click.

 

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: Why can't my brother accept my new boyfriend? He's not working and I'm supporting him for a few months, but he's a really good guy -- kind, nice, good to me, loving in bed. He can't go out job-hunting right now because his back is bothering him. Sometimes he tells stories, I know, but nothing big. Last night my brother asked me to coffee and told me he caught my boyfriend helping a friend move and carrying big furniture, no problem. That was just last Saturday. I said, "You're lying!" but he just shook his head stubbornly. My boyfriend denies to the death he was moving a friend, but my brother says he saw him and described him exactly, and the friends with him, and what he as wearing that day, even the brand name of his hat. I don't know what to think or say. This can't be true! He loves me and he would never do that to me. -- Loving Him So Much, North End

 

Dear Loving: It seems you may have been duped by a very attractive leech. Your boyfriend is faking a back injury so he doesn't have to job-hunt and work. You're facing an ugly truth and a possible break-up -- and trying desperately to look the other way. What do you want to do about it? It's one thing to support an adult partner if he's hurt and unable to work, but it's quite another to allow him to use you so he can lie on the couch, when his health is as good as yours. When do you get mad? He's insulting your intelligence and probably doesn't respect your believing him, either. . .. Your brother was right to take you out and tell you what he saw, taking the chance you would be upset and possibly angry with him. Your boyfriend, on the other hand, is going to look less and less appealing to you, lying on the couch while you get ready for work and he rubs the "sore spot." You know right now he has bad character, no matter how winning his smile and sweet his personality. Please allow yourself to see him clearly, and don't, whatever you do, get pregnant with this man. A lazy liar is not daddy or husband material

 

Questions or comments? Write Miss Lonelyhearts c/o Winnipeg Free Press 1355 Mountain Ave. Wpg R2X 3B6 or email lovecoach@hotmail.com

 

 

Republished from the Winnipeg Free Press print edition November 24, 2010 C6

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