Winnipeg Free Press - PRINT EDITION

Consider renting a second cottage

  • Print

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: We have a great family cottage, but it now houses three generations of women who are bossy and independent.

I'm the grandfather who's had to put up with bickering between my wife, daughter and teenage granddaughter. We've had two big incidents in two weeks at the cottage where my wife and grown daughter bared their teeth and fought over cottage rules and territorial rights. I love all of these women but I'm a senior executive in a big company with high blood pressure and I need to relax on the weekends. Rather than enter the fight, I simply said, "It's no fun for me to be here with the constant bickering and I'm taking the convertible home, where I can relax. Good night all." Then I walked out to the car with my wife behind me, shrieking things like, "You're going to break up the family if you do this!" I just said, "I really doubt that. Try to find a way to get along if you want other family members out here." Don't I sound strong and wise? Well, it backfired. My wife has been home since Sunday, and is not talking to me all this week. I need help.

-- Smart Guy? Tuxedo


Dear Smart: There simply isn't enough space or privacy in any cabin for a couple of generations when everything can be heard through the walls, and both groups want to live different styles. That's why cabins are delightful and relatively trouble-free when the first family is growing up, and psychologists make a lot of money working with "cottage angst" people June-September. Apologize for leaving your wife in an embarrassing situation instead of working out the problem, and tell her now much you love her. Then present her with a plan to end the cottage wars. It's time for a rental cottage and some privacy for the two fully-formed families. Since it sounds like you may have some extra cash lying around, how about helping with finances for the new spot? The younger family can chip in as much as they can afford. Talk to your daughter and her husband yourself, and take the blame for changes that need to be made. Explain your blood pressure is high in emotional battles, and you can't hazard a heart attack or a stroke over cottage fights. Plus, you know first-hand how stubborn her mom can be.


Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My friends like to go to the nude beach and hang around. I went last week and wore my bikini bottoms, but there was a lot of pressure and snarky remarks from my girlfriends to be totally naked like they were. I don't want to take off my bottoms. I don't know why; I just don't. What do you suggest? By the way, I'm 21 with an athletic body. I'm not trying to hide anything.

-- Just Topless, Patricia Beach


Dear Topless: "Clothing optional" is the term for most "nude" beaches. It's not mandatory, though a fully clothed bird-watching group might not be welcome.... Next time a girlfriend starts pressuring you to take off your whole bikini, speak up assertively. Say firmly, "Why is what I'm wearing, or not wearing, a problem for you?" If you can't get an answer from her, say, "I need to know because I'm fed up with pressure over this and I'm not going to take my bottoms off." If you shine the spotlight back on pressure bullies, they'll usually mutter something like, "Can't you take a joke?" Don't bow to this nonsense. Say evenly, "Well it sure doesn't sound like a joke to me." Then change the subject, and end it. You're the one in control.

Republished from the Winnipeg Free Press print edition June 26, 2009 d4

Fact Check

Fact Check

Have you found an error, or know of something we’ve missed in one of our stories?
Please use the form below and let us know.

* Required
  • Please post the headline of the story or the title of the video with the error.

  • Please post exactly what was wrong with the story.

  • Please indicate your source for the correct information.

  • Yes


  • This will only be used to contact you if we have a question about your submission, it will not be used to identify you or be published.

  • Cancel

Having problems with the form?

Contact Us Directly
  • Print

You can comment on most stories on You can also agree or disagree with other comments. All you need to do is be a Winnipeg Free Press print or e-edition subscriber to join the conversation and give your feedback.

You can comment on most stories on You can also agree or disagree with other comments. All you need to do is be a Winnipeg Free Press print or e-edition subscriber to join the conversation and give your feedback.

Have Your Say

New to commenting? Check out our Frequently Asked Questions.

Have Your Say

Comments are open to Winnipeg Free Press print or e-edition subscribers only. why?

Have Your Say

Comments are open to Winnipeg Free Press Subscribers only. why?

The Winnipeg Free Press does not necessarily endorse any of the views posted. By submitting your comment, you agree to our Terms and Conditions. These terms were revised effective April 16, 2010.


Make text: Larger | Smaller


Key of Bart - A Criminal Mind

View more like this

Photo Store Gallery

  • A Canada goose protects her nest full of eggs Monday on campus at the University of Manitoba- Standup photo- Apr 30, 2012   (JOE BRYKSA / WINNIPEG FREE PRESS)
  • A Canada goose makes takes flight on Wilkes Ave Friday afternoon- See Bryksa’s 30 Day goose a day challenge- Day 09- May 11, 2012   (JOE BRYKSA / WINNIPEG FREE PRESS)

View More Gallery Photos


Do you think the CMHR made the right decision in banning selfie sticks?

View Results

View Related Story

Ads by Google