DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: After we have sex, my husband doesn't go to sleep. I'd be glad if he would. Oh no, he lights a joint before we have sex and then goes to the kitchen after the fun, and eats us out of house and home. If he can't find enough munchies, because he ate everything the night before, he will actually get in the car and go to a convenience store and buy three bags of cookies and four litres of milk. It's like having it off with a high schooler. There's no cuddling and intimate talk and a delicious sleep together. The only thing that's delicious to him after sex is a box of Oreos. How can I get him to change? -- Disgusted Young Wife, Fort Rouge
Dear Disgusted: You want to hang out with your honey after sex? Install a munchies fridge in the bedroom stocked with the treats and drinks he craves and more inventive ones for you. For instance, you can teach him to feed you chocolate dipped fruits and champagne and maybe you'll even end up having Round 2. Just make sure the TV and remote are housed somewhere other than the boudoir.
Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: What advice do you have for couples with different religious beliefs who want to make it work? My girlfriend's a very devoted Christian, and is thinking about ending our relationship since I don't have the same beliefs. I consider myself agnostic. We love each other and get along together so well in every way, except this issue and how we plan to raise children. I can't exactly change how I think in a heartbeat. I have a strong science background and I never had an issue with my beliefs before. I don't want to change her or debate her beliefs. Rather, I try to support her whenever possible (i.e. go to church with her and say grace with her, which I never did before). I'm very passionate about this girl and have emotionally invested a lot. What are you thoughts on this? -- Confused Beyond Belief, Winnipeg
Dear Confused: Religious differences are big when you're considering marriage. If one or both people think they're the "right" one, or one person thinks religion is just pifflebunk, the couple has a serious built-in problem. Your girlfriend may be wondering if you're secretly rolling your eyes at her beliefs and traditions right now. If you married, and dropped off attending her church, that'd leave her a lonely mom with her kids at church, and no support at home when the kids are asking important questions. When difficulties come up, she will pray for guidance and strength, alone. Plus, it'd be warmer for her to raise a family with someone who doesn't think religious holidays were all about time off, gifts and candy. On the other hand, I met a man recently who told me he happily changes his church to whichever the lady in his life attends, and is happy to support her enthusiastically, but then he has a basic belief in God and an agnostic is not sure. Could you be sincerely supportive? If not, it's not going to work for your lady.
Questions or comments? Write Miss Lonelyhearts c/o Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Wpg , R2X 3B6, or email email@example.com