Take them up on their offer and you'll be getting a 'bill'

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: I travel a fair bit and have contacts through work and recreational pursuits. I have a tour coming up to Australia and have been asked if I'd like to stay with one of these contacts and his wife. I'm single and they are a lovely couple -- well-educated, well-employed, active but not over-active social and family lives. As I'm always trying to keep my travel expenses reasonable, and this is part vacation, I'm considering taking them up on their offer to camp out in their guest room for a couple of nights. Then I was told of the single "rule" they had for visiting guests: No sex unless the husband was involved.... Now, I must admit that made me smile, because I know their relationship is quite healthy. The charming wife (apparently) fully supports this house rule. The husband, a professional contact, surely doesn't lack for anything. I know people in our field who have stayed with them before and these folk certainly didn't complain. Am I totally into a single woman's "mid-life" crisis to think it would be interesting to test out this rule? -- Wondering, Westwood

Dear Wondering: They may be well-educated and sophisticated, but the man is actually running a little sexual adventure situation for himself, out of their house. The invitation to stay there certainly doesn't come free. You have no privacy to have a private romance of your own, and the pressure's on if you stay with this couple. To be clear, they'd like a threesome, or perhaps a foursome if you were so bold as to bring someone else home. And, give your business head a shake -- why would you want to sleep with a professional contact? That's always a bad idea. If you can afford to travel to Australia, you can afford to get your own little hotel room nearby and visit with them for dinner. While you're still here in Canada, tell them charmingly you always like having your own hotel, but would enjoy having a lovely meal out with them in Oz. And, for interest sake, you might ask the other people who have stayed over, about the house rule and their experiences -- if you think they'll tell.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: This fall I'm going into my final year before I go to high school and have a decision to make in coming months. I'm torn. Should I go to a high school where I know some people from other schools going there, or should I go to the school where my school friends are going? Last year I thought I knew which high school to go to, but last year people at my school in my grade all got tighter with each other, and I liked that feeling. Please give me your opinion on the subject. SDHpSEmD Torn Between Two Paths

Dear Torn: You're about 14, and life is difficult enough at that age. Go with your friends, if you have a tight and happy group and enjoy the longer relationship with them through high school years. It can be tough going into a new high school with very few friends in the crowd, and having to start over socially. But, if the school where your present friends are talking about going is inferior, and doesn't give you the courses you need, then you simply must opt for the other school where you know fewer people. Make sure you investigate the two schools thoroughly this fall so there's no surprises in what's available at both places. You need to keep all doors open to the possible careers you may be thinking about down the road. Social life is important, but secondary.

Questions or comments? Write Miss Lonelyhearts c/o Winnipeg Free Press 1355 Mountain Ave. Wpg R2X 3B6 or email lovecoach@hotmail.com

Republished from the Winnipeg Free Press print edition September 12, 2011 D5