Winnipeg Free Press - PRINT EDITION

Wedding was pretend, pain it caused is real

  • Print

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: Long ago and far away I met a beautiful young man and fell in love. We got married in a non-legal ceremony on a beach at sunset with a hippie wedding dress and ring and everything. That relationship fell apart and I came back to Canada. A few years later I met a wonderful man and we got married for real -- legally. I have always been true. But, thanks to the dubious wonders of the Internet, my old ex-love from the other country found me and sent wedding pictures people took of us over there. He meant no trouble, just sharing a bit of the past. Well, I accidentally left the picture open and my husband walked by and saw me all dressed in white long dress on the beach looking in love and wearing a ring. Now there's hell to pay! "Why didn't you tell me you were married before? Is this bigamy? What else have you not told me? Are you still in love with him?" Finally I got my "ex" to write and explain the situation and apologize for upsetting my husband, and now he finally believes the truth. But, he has not slept in the same bedroom with me since. Can you help? -- Not a Bigamist, Brandon

Dear Not a Bigamist: It's odd you didn't tell your husband you had a pretend wedding. It's the kind of lying by omission about life situations that makes people wonder what else you're hiding -- affairs, offshore bank accounts, plans to get back together with someone. You two need professional help now. It was decent of your ex-love to write your husband and it has probably helped him somewhat, but he's still withholding himself from you because he doesn't trust you. A good relationship counsellor can help reduce the mistrust significantly and the rest will take time to and more counselling to come back. The fact he needs to digest? He has been your only man, ever since you met. You haven't cheated on him but he's so mixed up he needs to hear that from someone else, like a counsellor.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I cry a lot. Tears just well up. I'm so easily touched and cry over TV shows. I'm easily hurt, easily frightened. When I am frightened I sometimes have to run to the bathroom to be sick. I often feel on the verge of tears for no reason. What is wrong with me? -- Crying Again, Downtown

Dear Crying: You need to see your doctor right away about depression and/or anxiety. You shouldn't have to be fighting these strong emotions all the time. It isn't normal to have all your emotions sitting there at the surface with your eyes ready to brim over. Your body is sounding the alarm, saying you need a diagnosis, perhaps some medication and certainly some counselling help. That's nothing to be ashamed of. We all go through some bad periods in life where we need help. You don't say how old you are but could your hormones be playing havoc? Your doctor will test for that and other possible factors.

Questions or comments? Write Miss Lonelyhearts c/o Winnipeg Free Press 1355 Mountain Ave. Wpg R2X 3B6 or email

lovecoach@hotmail.com

Republished from the Winnipeg Free Press print edition July 31, 2010 C3

Fact Check

Fact Check

Have you found an error, or know of something we’ve missed in one of our stories?
Please use the form below and let us know.

* Required
  • Please post the headline of the story or the title of the video with the error.

  • Please post exactly what was wrong with the story.

  • Please indicate your source for the correct information.

  • Yes

    No

  • This will only be used to contact you if we have a question about your submission, it will not be used to identify you or be published.

  • Cancel

Having problems with the form?

Contact Us Directly
  • Print

You can comment on most stories on winnipegfreepress.com. You can also agree or disagree with other comments. All you need to do is be a Winnipeg Free Press print or e-edition subscriber to join the conversation and give your feedback.

You can comment on most stories on winnipegfreepress.com. You can also agree or disagree with other comments. All you need to do is be a Winnipeg Free Press print or e-edition subscriber to join the conversation and give your feedback.

Have Your Say

New to commenting? Check out our Frequently Asked Questions.

Have Your Say

Comments are open to Winnipeg Free Press print or e-edition subscribers only. why?

Have Your Say

Comments are open to Winnipeg Free Press Subscribers only. why?

The Winnipeg Free Press does not necessarily endorse any of the views posted. By submitting your comment, you agree to our Terms and Conditions. These terms were revised effective April 16, 2010.

letters

Make text: Larger | Smaller

LATEST VIDEO

Winnipeg Cheapskate: Your cheapskate questions

View more like this

Photo Store Gallery

  • Winnipeg’s best friend the dragon fly takes a break at English Gardens in Assiniboine Park Wednesday- A dragon fly can eat  food equal to its own weight in 30 minutes-Standup photo- June 13, 2012   (JOE BRYKSA / WINNIPEG FREE PRESS)
  • Water lilys are reflected in the pond at the Leo Mol Sculpture Garden Tuesday afternoon. Standup photo. Sept 11,  2012 (Ruth Bonneville/Winnipeg Free Press)

View More Gallery Photos

Poll

Do you think the Jets' three pre-season losses in a row are a sign of things to come?

View Results

View Related Story

Ads by Google