DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: Should a person tell their partner if he isn't bringing her to orgasm? If so, how detailed should she be? -- Tired of Faking It, Selkirk
Dear Tired: Nothing can get fixed if the person affected is pretending everything's all right. At a time when a couple is not in the bedroom, which is an emotional setting, it would be wise to tell the other person, in colourful detail, the truth about the fastest way to get them over the brink. Mentioning the faking is not necessary. Look, lots of women have faked it so long they don't know how to finally tell the truth. It can come as a big shock to a partner. Now more and more men are admitting they fake it, too. When they are losing their erection, they make appropriate sounds and pretend it's all over. Sometimes both people are faking it so they can just give up and go to sleep. Mutually phoney sex is a waste of everybody's snooze time.
Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I went horseback riding and met the love of my life on holiday in Mexico. He was taking the people out on guided tours. I went every day I was there. I fell for him and he fell for me, but I was married -- and bored stiff -- at the time. When I got back to Canada I knew the marriage was nowhere. We have since broken up and I want to go back to this ranch and find that darling man, who told me, with a sweet smile, he was "very single!" -- Am I a Fool in Love? Winnipeg
Dear Am I: It's not likely love, though it could be infatuation, on your side. But, he may not be as lonely as you have been! If this fellow is guiding groups on horseback and telling women he's "very single," it's likely he has some takers. Having said that, if this dream is going to haunt you, it would be best to go check out the situation. There is nothing more powerful than a big dream left unexplored to ruin what you have in your life here and now. Do be prepared for this guy to be anything when you go back -- very single, very married with a pack of kids, single with a girlfriend in every touring group -- or actually a sweetheart of a man hoping you'd come back to him one day.
Questions or comments? Please email firstname.lastname@example.org or send letters c/o Miss Lonelyhearts, 1355 Mountain Ave. Winnipeg R2X 3B6