Winnipeg Free Press - PRINT EDITION

Stop stealing boyfriend's stuff

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DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: All right, I did something bad and I know it, and now I have to undo it. I am so in love with my new boyfriend that I stole one of his sweaters to sleep in it. That was his favourite sweater from his ex-girlfriend (OUCH) and he's started obsessing about it "disappearing just-like-that" after he wore it one night out with me. "How could that happen?" he keeps asking. Well, you-know-who picked it up from the floor and stuffed it in her purse. Should I just bring it back and confess, bearing in mind we don't know each other that well yet, and he might think I'm creepy? Or, I could also just slip it back next time I'm over -- I was thinking of stuffing it down behind the head of the bed and then pulling it out and saying, "Oh look what we have here -- your sweater." What do you think? -- Sweater Stealer, West Kildonan

Dear Stealer: Stuff it down the back of the bed and let the sleeve hang out -- and never do this kind of thing again. S tealing from people is a breach of trust. You can reveal the truth one day if you ever get married, and he might think it's cute.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I'm an older guy -- in my 50s -- and have a strange situation. My wife is very interested in sex, but I'm rather bored with her. Truth is, I'm totally intrigued by my grown-up daughter's nanny for the the grandkids. She is well-educated and intellectual and travelling and working her way round the world. She has a great accent. I will look like a reprehensible old man if I ever let her know, but I make every excuse to see the grandkids just to go over there. What should I do? My wife doesn't deserve this situation as an unknown problem in her life, but I can't help myself. Some people would call me a dirty old man. -- Helplessly Enchanted By her, Tuxedo

Dear Enchanted: Stay home. in a matter of months she will be gone. Don't ruin your whole life in the meantime. As long as you don't go over there, you won't be stirring yourself up. Try to sublimate your feelings and have more fun and intimate times with your wife. Telling your mate would be a terrible idea, or confessing any of this to the nanny would be awful for her and for the family. This is your secret. Most people have secret crushes during a marriage and keep them quiet. Do that.

lovecoach@hotmail.com

Republished from the Winnipeg Free Press print edition October 5, 2012 D5

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