Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 11/11/2013 (902 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.
The solution to the Jets' problems is to create a new line. At centre, Stephen (Trust Me) Harper, one of the best at deflecting anything shot in his direction.
At left wing, Rob (Boom Boom) Ford. He'll go into the corners and take whatever beating his opponents can offer, only to come back for more. At right wing, Sam (the Fox) Katz. He'll weave in and out so he is never checked.
If, for whatever reason, Claude Noel can no longer take the heat, Phil Sheegl can fill in and pretend he knows what he's doing.