The Los Angeles Sparks hit just two of 37 three-pointers in losing their first-round WNBA playoff series.
Needless to say, they weren't playing in the Target Center.
-- At TheOnion.com: "Manager inspires Marlins with clubhouse reading of contractual obligations to play out season."
-- At SportsPickle.com: "Report: All of the 49ers may have been drunk the last two weeks."
Sunday's Angels-Mariners game was twice delayed by a swarm of bees in right field--three months after a similar swarm in Kansas City took up residence in L.A.'s dugout.
Coincidence? Some 21 of the 33 players on the Angels' September roster played Triple-A ball for the Salt Lake City Bees.
Stark Raven nuts
"Hit over the head by a stripper wielding a Champagne bottle on a party bus" is:
a) Ravens receiver Jacoby Jones' latest claim to fame.
b) a game of Clue gone amok.
Nifty hiding spot
The winner of a $400-million Powerball lottery apparently wants to remain anonymous.
First order of business: Buy Tampa Bay Rays season tickets!
Tuesday, in case you missed it, was National Punctuation Day.
So why wasn't Bartolo Colon pitching?
Brad Dickson of the Omaha (Neb.) World-Herald, on Mike Tyson saying he wants to become a promoter to give the sport a boost: "If this ex-con with the facial tattoo who once bit part of the ear off a competitor can't restore the image of boxing, who can?"
NBC's Jimmy Fallon, after police arrested two men who allegedly tried to rob a group of people playing Bingo in New Hampshire: "Cops became suspicious when they saw a car driving away from the Bingo hall going more than 10 miles an hour."
Advertising account executive, surgeon and stockbroker came in 1-2-3 in CareerCast.com's ranking of the most overrated jobs of 2013.
Two baseball jobs somehow missing the cut: Marlins luxury-tax auditor and Blue Jays title-parade planner.
-- The Seattle Times