New boyfriend has crush on teenage girl’s mother

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This article was published 19/01/2017 (3239 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My heart is broken because of my hot-looking mother. I’m 18 and she’s in her early 30s because she had me as a teenager. She is very beautiful and lonely. I should have known better than to bring a guy home. I’m attracted to older guys. This guy said under his breath when I introduced him, “You didn’t tell me your mother was so young.” He’s in his late 20s. My mom didn’t come on to him, but he fell for her, not me, and started wanting to come to my house every time we had a date. We had just started getting into each other, and I was crazy about him. 

We hadn’t had sex when he met my mother. He kept holding off, using all kinds of excuses. Finally, I asked if he didn’t find me attractive, and he said he did, but he was falling for someone else. Knowing the answer in my heart already, I asked him to tell me who, and he said, “Your mother.”

I pushed him out the door, and when my mother came home, I was sobbing. She asked what was going on and I told her, “My boyfriend wants you, not me.” She went quiet and got a funny look on her face and said, “He’s very attractive, but I certainly don’t want him because it would hurt you.” Notice she didn’t say she didn’t want him. I think she does. Now I feel sick to my stomach and don’t know what to do. — BF Wants My Mom, Winnipeg

Dear BF Wants My Mom: This guy was bad news for your little family from the start. He should have backed off the minute he realized how he felt about your mom, but didn’t. Don’t feel even the littlest bit sorry for him, or your mom. She “went quiet” because she had a feeling this was going on and let it unfold. This guy can find someone else. Your good-looking mom can also find a new partner, other than a guy in his 20s who was initially going for her teenage daughter.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I met a guy who goes to the same food court I do. We shared a lunch table when it was busy (his idea) and kept on doing it. But it doesn’t go anywhere. Lunch every day, then nothing. On the weekends, I’m alone and he says he has no one, either. The thing is, he isn’t shy. He could ask me out but doesn’t. We say goodbye on Fridays and hello on Mondays. What should I do, if anything? — Weekend Wipeout, Portage & Main

Dear Weekend Wipeout: You make the move. So here’s the strategy for the next lunch: go prepared. Pick out a few movies that look good, and bring the entertainment section stuffed in your purse. Suggest three movies on the weekend, and ask if he’ll join you for one. If he says yes, but doesn’t like any of the movies you put forward, bring the listings out! If he refuses all those, he’s had it. No more free lunches, dining on your wit and charm.

If you want to go back to that food court, bring a friend with you the next few times. You can’t go to lunch with a guy you have a crush on for more hopeless weeks and months — it’s a big waste of time when he doesn’t want wonderful you. Silly man!

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

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