August 20, 2018

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Opinion

Boyfriend didn't appreciate ex-husband moving in

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 26/1/2018 (206 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I let my ex-husband move back into a room in my basement because he lost his job before Christmas, ran out on his apartment lease and has nowhere to go. His own mother wouldn’t even take him back. He is the father of my children. He told me he was looking at homelessness, so I had a heart and let him crawl back.

The kids think it’s great that the family is back together again, sort of, and they’re down in the basement right now teaching their dad all the computer games they play, like he’s their new teenage buddy. This is perfect for him because he never quite left his teen years behind. The man has the maturity of a 17-year-old and has lost job after job for sleeping in or totally missing work. I nastily suggested a job at McDonald’s, and he almost lost his breakfast. He has a hot temper, though never raises a hand to anybody. He just roars like a lion and then goes and smokes pot in his truck and calms down.

Now he doesn’t even have money for pot.

I hate having him here and my new boyfriend hates it even more. He said last night that he was going to stay over like he usually does and if my ex-husband didn’t like it he could get a tent and move to the bush. I found this funny and started laughing. Then he went all quiet and said he wasn’t kidding. He left and hasn’t contacted me since. Help! — Chased Away My New Boyfriend, Charleswood

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Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 26/1/2018 (206 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I let my ex-husband move back into a room in my basement because he lost his job before Christmas, ran out on his apartment lease and has nowhere to go. His own mother wouldn’t even take him back. He is the father of my children. He told me he was looking at homelessness, so I had a heart and let him crawl back.

The kids think it’s great that the family is back together again, sort of, and they’re down in the basement right now teaching their dad all the computer games they play, like he’s their new teenage buddy. This is perfect for him because he never quite left his teen years behind. The man has the maturity of a 17-year-old and has lost job after job for sleeping in or totally missing work. I nastily suggested a job at McDonald’s, and he almost lost his breakfast. He has a hot temper, though never raises a hand to anybody. He just roars like a lion and then goes and smokes pot in his truck and calms down.

Now he doesn’t even have money for pot.

I hate having him here and my new boyfriend hates it even more. He said last night that he was going to stay over like he usually does and if my ex-husband didn’t like it he could get a tent and move to the bush. I found this funny and started laughing. Then he went all quiet and said he wasn’t kidding. He left and hasn’t contacted me since. Help! — Chased Away My New Boyfriend, Charleswood

Dear Chased Away My New Boyfriend: So your ex couldn’t go on assistance of some kind? Hmmm. Maybe you should get your head back in gear and find out what other separated or divorced men do when they lose their jobs.

You have been taken in by this leech.

Who can blame your new guy for being upset when you let your old husband right back into your private domain to play the "Creature in the Basement?" Your boyfriend may be gone already and who can blame him?

Actually, you chased him away by inviting your ex-husband back, so take a good look at that move and what it means. You have to figure out a way to get him out of your house if you really don’t want him there. 

 

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: Valentine’s Day is coming and I’m nervous. I think I may be falling in love with my girlfriend, but I’m not sure if I want to be her husband. She already knows she wants to marry me, but I need another year or two to decide on a lifetime commitment with her. If she tries harder to push me to the wall, I’m going to push back and move to California. I have a great job in the tech world and my cousin says he could get me a job there easily and you know what everybody says about girls from Cali.

I’m planning to give my girlfriend pink roses as a reflection of our six-month relationship. What do you think? — Playing the Game Carefully, Southdale

Dear Playing the Game Carefully: You’re not ready to play any love game at all.

Plan to give those pink roses to your mother or grandmother after your girlfriend puts them down by the sink, with no water.

Pink roses can be symbolic of gratefulness and appreciation, but not passionate love. Red roses are for love and I’m guessing even you know that.

Just as no one except a lady who gets paid for her passion wants to hear "thank you" after sex, no girlfriend with passion and marriage on her mind wants to see a bouquet of pink roses coming through her door, unless there’s a diamond ring hanging from the top blossom.

Get a job in California and pack your bags, junior.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6

 

Miss Lonelyhearts

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

Each year, the Free Press publishes more than 1,000 letters to Miss Lonelyhearts and her responses to the life and relationship questions that come her way.

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