DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: My son’s teacher made it pretty obvious he has a crush on me, and to be honest, I can’t stop thinking about him.
I’m married and my husband used to be well-groomed and full of life, but lost his job months ago, and lately he has really stopped trying. He goes to the gym without showering most of the time and just wears a hat to make it less obvious he doesn’t wash his hair much. He just watches TV and sits on his phone.
My son’s teacher is about six years younger than me, fit, well-dressed and flirty as heck. Please help me ignore him. I don’t want to make a big mistake!
— Sorely Tempted, Brandon
Dear Sorely: Why do you need to see your son’s teacher on a regular basis? Is your child so young he needs help dressing for winter to go home? If you are not forced to see this teacher, stop going to the classroom!
If you are struggling with temptation, you could use this little NLP (neuro-linguistic programming) exercise to help. Look at the hot male teacher and imagine you hear your son crying, "I want my daddy. I love my daddy. Please don’t make him go away." That should help turn you off, and put a stop to your playing along with the flirty teacher. Your husband isn’t the only one who can find the job he needs. Rally your family and friends and see if you can’t help your husband make the contacts that will get him a job.
He is clearly depressed — the lack of attention to grooming is the same with humans and animals. Your guy is paying no attention to cleaning his body or his hair because he is blue and can’t stand himself. Speak to your doctor and ask your man to talk to his about his depression and possibly get some help and medication for it. And remember, flirting with your boy’s teacher will do nothing good for you, your child or your marriage.
Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: For the past few months I’ve noticed this car in my neighbour’s driveway certain afternoons. I didn’t think much of it at first, as my neighbour has a couple of cars. Well, I just saw her kissing someone that was not her husband. They were standing in front of the kitchen window — and she saw me watching.
This afternoon she came over and begged me not to tell on her about her lover, as her husband is brutal and has beaten her. I told her it was wrong and she should be ashamed!
Now what? Do I talk to the husband somehow? My husband says I’m a busy- body and should mind my own business. I am a church-going woman and believe in the sanctity of marriage!
— Promise Keeper, West Kildonan
Dear Promise Keeper: Think ahead. Let’s say you go ahead and tell the husband and he comes home and beats his wife to a pulp, or finds the lover and goes after him with a weapon. How would you feel then about telling on the wife?
Why not close your curtains and let this just be? It’s not your life, and your female neighbour is not ruining a good marriage. In fact, it’s a very bad marriage and a dangerous situation for you to become a part of any more than you are now. Let the wife know by telephone you’re not going to be the one to tell on her and that it’s her life, even if you don’t approve.
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Each year, the Free Press publishes more than 1,000 letters to Miss Lonelyhearts and her responses to the life and relationship questions that come her way.