July 7, 2020

16° C, Clear

Full Forecast


Advertise With Us


Time to cut off pampered 'artiste'

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: I’m tired of my husband’s criticizing glances. He knows enough not to say anything because he has made me cry before! But I can see him thinking, "She’s too fat, too many lines, too frumpy. I could do better." 

He is tall, fit, good-looking, seven years younger, and can eat a refrigerator full without gaining an ounce. He originally married me because I was so much fun and had enough money to carry us both, after a large inheritance. 

Now the situation of being grateful for being fed and housed has worn off, and he barely works. He’s an "artiste" and "the muse" just doesn’t seem to visit him when he isn’t broke. Like she visited when I met him. Then he painted up a storm and had shows and sold paintings. I look at him now and think "you lazy pretty boy!" 

He reminds me I don’t have to work either, unless I want to, but I’m in a profession I like. I work 40 hours a week, at least. 

He doesn’t leave me because what would he do for food and a place to sleep? I don’t think he cheats on me, but it’s very possible. There is no love between us anymore. I’d like to have a baby but I wouldn’t want him to be at home with it. What should I do? — Resenting the Loafer, River Heights

Dear Resenting: It’s interesting YOU married a lazy pretty boy. Were you a tad shallow yourself at one time? Don’t think he isn’t aware when he’s hurting you with "looks" to put you in your place. He also feels your silent criticism now that he’s not producing any artwork to sell. 

You don’t love him anymore, so leave him and find somebody else who’s a beautiful person on the inside, has a work ethic and wants a baby with you. Your present husband will get some of your money in the divorce settlement which will give him more than enough to invest in some paint and brushes and possibly rent a studio.


Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I ran into an old friend on the elevator of my highrise office building, where he tells me he now works too. He quickly wormed it into the conversation that he’s no longer married to an old friend of mine from college. He called his marital state "recently single again." 

I always had a crush on this guy. What are the chances he and his wife will get back together again? — Dying to Reconnect with this Hottie, Downtown 

Dear Dying to Reconnect: Chances are much better this couple will reconnect if his wife hears he’s thinking of messing with an old friend of hers. Keep your mitts off him, until they’re filing divorce papers. Separated people are highly volatile. Who knows what can happen?

You can maybe be friendly and go to lunch once if he asks, but only if you can trust your body not to make your mouth start promising anything more. Here’s why dating him would bee a very foolish move: If he and his wife are angry with each other, he could slip it into the conversation that he saw you for lunch, say you’re "doing very well" these days, and then smile. That’s all he’d need to give her — one wicked smile.

There’s nothing like an old female "friend" who’s trying to snag a separated husband to stoke up feelings of jealousy, competition and possessiveness. That may even get the couple back together again, which may or may not be a good thing for them. (But for you, it wouldn’t be something to cheer about.)


Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Miss Lonelyhearts

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

Each year, the Free Press publishes more than 1,000 letters to Miss Lonelyhearts and her responses to the life and relationship questions that come her way.

Read full biography


Advertise With Us

Your support has enabled us to provide free access to stories about COVID-19 because we believe everyone deserves trusted and critical information during the pandemic.

Our readership has contributed additional funding to give Free Press online subscriptions to those that can’t afford one in these extraordinary times — giving new readers the opportunity to see beyond the headlines and connect with other stories about their community.

To those who have made donations, thank you.

To those able to give and share our journalism with others, please Pay it Forward.

The Free Press has shared COVID-19 stories free of charge because we believe everyone deserves access to trusted and critical information during the pandemic.

While we stand by this decision, it has undoubtedly affected our bottom line.

After nearly 150 years of reporting on our city, we don’t want to stop any time soon. With your support, we’ll be able to forge ahead with our journalistic mission.

If you believe in an independent, transparent, and democratic press, please consider subscribing today.

We understand that some readers cannot afford a subscription during these difficult times and invite them to apply for a free digital subscription through our Pay it Forward program.

The Free Press will close this commenting platform at noon on July 14.

We want to thank those who have shared their views over the years as part of this reader engagement initiative.

In the coming weeks, the Free Press will announce new opportunities for readers to share their thoughts and to engage with our staff and each other.

You can comment on most stories on The Winnipeg Free Press website. You can also agree or disagree with other comments. All you need to do is be a Winnipeg Free Press print or digital subscriber to join the conversation and give your feedback.

Have Your Say

Have Your Say

Comments are open to The Winnipeg Free Press print or digital subscribers only. why?

Have Your Say

Comments are open to The Winnipeg Free Press Subscribers only. why?

By submitting your comment, you agree to abide by our Community Standards and Moderation Policy. These guidelines were revised effective February 27, 2019. Have a question about our comment forum? Check our frequently asked questions.


Advertise With Us