Brothers still teaching important lessons

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This article was published 29/01/2019 (2622 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

You’re not alone.

That’s one of the key messages Dr. Duane Brothers wants to convey in light of Bell Let’s Talk Day on Jan. 30.

Brothers, who officially retired from his role as superintendent of Louis Riel School Division at the end of last year, has opened up to The Lance about his own personal struggles with mental illness and deep depression.

A high-profile leader in the education system for nearly two decades, Brothers, 57, has spoken throughout North America about leadership, citizenship, race relations, and governance. As well, for the last two years of his academic career, the Whyte Ridge resident said he also advocated with members of the division’s leadership council, and board office staff, about the importance of mental well-being, and he is grateful for the support he received from the division.

Brothers said the treatment he sought was very successful and he no longer suffers from depression. However, given that so many people still struggle with the disease — it is a chronic condition for some — he is still passionate about sharing his story, to let others in his situation know that help is available. And he hopes that sharing his story will help others come to terms with their own struggles with mental illness, as well as help combat the negative connotations the disease carries.

“If I’m dealing with this, then one in five of my former staff, students, their parents, and all Canadians will have somebody in their family or someone they care about deal with it,” Brothers said. “It’s devastating.”

Brothers said that two of the biggest triggers for his depression were the death of his father, who had suffered from Alzheimer’s disease for a decade, and returning to work too early after major back surgery.

Following the surgery, Brothers returned to work within two months, which he realizes was a mistake in hindsight. Noting how his depression became a spiral, Brothers said his social anxiety increased as he wondered what people were thinking about him, and as he heaped unrealistic expectations upon himself.

In short — he had been “a Type A tough guy who masked” his depression.  

“I shouldn’t have gone back so soon, as I was in a lot of physical and psychological pain. So, if my lesson can help other people, then I‘m wide open to doing so. There’s a huge stigma around mental illness, and there’s some important lessons to learn from Bell Let’s Talk Day,” Brothers said. “One is to talk about it. Language matters, so pay attention to the words you use. Mental illness is a very common thing, and the people dealing with it are not bad people. It’s important to educate yourself about it, and learn to understand the signs. Some people are genuinely suffering, so be kind, as small acts of kindness mean a lot.

“Reach out, and be caring. Listen, and ask. Sometimes, it’s best just to listen. Many people who deal with it are embarrassed — I was embarrassed. Now, I’m pleased to be the person who will talk about it, and start a dialogue and help break the cycle. Depression is very debilitating, and it affects you physically as much as mentally. While I was suffering, I stopped eating, lost 25 pounds, and had tremendous social anxiety. Because I was a leader I wore a mask.”

Brothers said he was open with his senior management team, and shared details of his illness some time ago. He’s thankful for the support of his former colleagues, as well as the support of his loved, ones, family, and friends.

And now, as Brothers encourages more individuals to join the discussion about mental illness, he knows he’s not alone.