Time to talk about the end
Death Café promotes conversation about the end of life over cake
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This article was published 23/05/2017 (3053 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.
You can talk about nearly anything — even death itself — so long as the coffee and company are good.
On May 31, Fort Garry United Church will host Winnipeg’s third Death Café in partnership with Community Deathcare Manitoba.
The event is a chance for members of the public to start a conversation with their neighbours about death and dying over coffee and sweets, and shake the taboo that frames the end of life.
Min-Goo Kang is the minister of Fort Garry United (800 Point Rd.) and suggested the church host a Death Café after learning about events held in Lord Roberts and downtown. This is the first local café hosted in partnership with a faith community.
“As host of the event you provide a safe environment, a safe space for people to talk about what they’re dying to talk about, which is death,” Kang said. “We don’t have that space in our daily lives.
“You get to know the people around you who share the same concerns, the same interests, so it’s like a sharing circle around coffee, tea, and a piece of cake,” he added.
Jackie Avent, an administrator with Community Deathcare Manitoba, explains that Death Café doesn’t carry an agenda and the conversations that take place are directed by those who are participating. People are also welcome to exchange ideas about death and dying in the context they’re most familiar with.
“People are encouraged to talk about whatever worldview they come from or aspire to,” Avent said.
“The conversations that I’ve had with people have spanned everything from what a good death means to them or how they hope to die, and what sort of things they’ve done or want to do to prepare to leave their families supported and informed about their wishes for funerals or end of life care.
“I think there’s a hunger to have a space to talk about these matters,” she said.
The format of Death Café originated in the United Kingdom in 2011 when creator Jon Underwood and psychotherapist Sue Barsky Reid hosted the first event. The format has since spread across Europe and North America. An estimated 4,600 cafés have been held worldwide since 2011. The two previous events in Winnipeg have been well attended, Avent said.
Both Avent and Kang agree that there is a growing interest among the public to have greater control over dying and bring the care of those who’ve died back to the community level.
Death Café is a step in that direction by giving people a chance to have their opinions and views on death heard and validated, Kang said.
“Society is managed by experts in every aspect of our life, whether it’s medical, school or law,” Kang said. “There’s a sense of inadequacy. When it comes to dying and death, I think we are losing a capacity to embrace that it becomes a meaningful event for our lives, family, and community by leaving everything up to an organization.”
Death Café is free to attend but there is a cap at 50 participants. The event runs from 7 to 9 p.m. For more information go to bit.ly/2pYCzcn or call 204-475-1586.
