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A couple of weeks ago, we launched a new series in the Free Press arts section called It’s the Little Things, which collects small actions or habits that might contribute to one’s happiness.
Our first edition included such tips as eating strawberries in season, asking a real person instead of Googling and driving with the windows down: simple things with disproportionate rewards.
It’s an idea that’s been percolating in my mind since I watched Wim Wenders’ 2023 masterpiece Perfect Days, which follows a taciturn man (Kōji Yakusho) as he goes about his life as a cleaner of Japanese public toilets.
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Although these edifices are often quite beautiful (especially compared with their North American counterparts), it’s still work that could be considered demeaning. But not only does he bring a quiet dignity to it, he also seems to find peace in his life, which is based on repeated routine.
Whether he’s watering his plants, reading his book before bed or simply taking a deep breath and looking at the sky with his morning coffee before setting off on his rounds, he seems calm and centred, not ecstatic but content.
A lot of the happiness-inducing actions I’ve been thinking about since then could probably be reduced to the idea of mindfulness, of taking a moment to pause and reflect on/revel in the various ways we have of being part of the natural world. (Perfect Days’ protagonist lives an analogue, phone-free life.)
But I also want the series to reflect modern realities, where our attention is often fragmented. For instance, social media is an indelible part of our lives, but the way we interact with it can be shaped to bring us more optimism, less dread; how can we focus on the parts of it — and there are many — that spotlight creativity or goofiness or beauty?
One of the ways to increase well-being that’s making the rounds lately — it’s been the subject of podcasts and Substacks and a recent New York Times newsletter — is Talking to Strangers.
I am in general not a fan. I wouldn’t call myself an introvert, but I’m perfectly happy with a friendly nod and a retreat into companionable silence when in forced proximity with someone I don’t know.
However, I have a friend for whom every stranger is just a pal she hasn’t met yet. She knows the life story of the grocery store cashier, and has never emerged from a cab without a tale from its driver.
It seems to bring her great happiness and it definitely fosters a sense of community and connection.
So on a recent trip to Toronto, when my Uber driver Viraj began making small talk, I decided to engage. I learned about his family in India, and how he’d quit his previous job because of the toxic work environment. Uber driving was a temporary gig until he could find more work in his field, but he liked the way he’d become more familiar with his adopted hometown.
I told him I was in town for the Canadian Screen Awards and that I was nervous because I’d never worked a red carpet before. We talked about newspapers and Winnipeg and the pros and cons of a big city versus a smaller one. We talked about talking to strangers, and how he didn’t always like chatting with his riders, but sometimes it was the best part of the job.
It was a 30-minute ride and it flew by. When I arrived at my friend’s place, he took my bag out of the trunk and waited until I walked up to the door before yelling, “Good luck at the screen awards, Jill! You’ve got this!”
I tell you, the jolt of pure joy I got from those words of encouragement — from a total stranger I will never see again — was acute, and something I revisited several times over the course of the weekend.
What things or activities bring you pleasure? How do you make the most of your one and only life? Reply to this newsletter or email arts@freepress.mb.ca with the subject line Little Things (please include your full name) and we’ll run your suggestions in a future column.
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