Einstein of burger world gone

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 04/01/2010 (5833 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

I got to thinking about an amazing guy named Al Bernardin the other day.

I got to thinking about Al while I was on the treadmill at the gym.

My reason for being on the treadmill and my reason for thinking about Al Bernardin are pretty much the same.

The reason is: Cheeseburgers. And when I say “cheeseburgers,” I mean big, fat, sloppy cheeseburgers, the kind of cheeseburgers around which persons of my gender would willingly build a major religion.

To say I like cheeseburgers is an understatement. It’s like saying Tiger Woods likes to play around once in a while, if you catch my general drift.

I will try to explain. You see, one of my wife’s New Year’s resolutions is for me to do something about my weight. I tried to show her how serious I was about this resolution the other night by putting on my parka, stumbling into the backyard, knocking the snow off my barbecue and grilling some cheeseburgers.

I should point out grilling in subarctic weather does involve a certain amount of exercise in the sense that, if your barbecue is positioned too close to the side of your house, you will burn up quite a few calories dodging falling icicles. You will also have to sprint into the house quite frequently to ensure your beer doesn’t freeze.

But my wife didn’t see this frosty weight-loss regimen in a positive light. So she decided to motivate me to go to the gym. She did this via the standard motivational technique of telling my boss, Bob, to drive to our house, pick me up and physically take me to the nearest gym.

Which is how I ended up on the treadmill, which is where, to the sounds of my sneaker-clad feed thumping like pistons and my lungs wheezing like a runaway locomotive and my heart pounding like the drummer for a heavy metal band, I started thinking about Al Bernardin.

I started thinking how much I was going to miss Al, even though I’d never actually met him.

If you don’t know who Al Bernardin was, then you are probably what health professionals and exercise experts refer to as “a woman.” Whereas if you are a guy like me, a middle-aged newspaper columnist who adores a great idea and a perfectly grilled burger, you will know that Al Bernardin was the Albert Einstein of the hamburger world.

But instead of giving the world the theory of relativity, Al gave us something much more useful — the McDonald’s Quarter Pounder. According to recent news reports, Al went to work at McDonald’s corporate HQ in 1960 and quickly became the dean of Hamburger University, the burger chain’s training centre.

As a vice-president of product development, he played a key role in the creation of McDonald’s fish sandwich, french fries and their hot apple and cherry pies.

But that wasn’t enough for Al. He was not the kind of guy who could look at a basic hamburger and think to himself: “Yummy!” No, Al was the kind of guy who thought to himself: “How can I build a much bigger burger?”

So that’s what he did. In 1971, as a franchise owner in California, he gave the world the Quarter Pounder. In short order, he also gave the world the Quarter Pounder with cheese. The world has never been the same.

Here’s what he said about his invention in a 1991 interview: “I felt there was a void in our menu vis-a-vis the adult who wanted a higher ratio of meat to bun.”

That’s what made Al great. He approached hamburgers the way we should approach life: Demanding a higher ratio of meat to bun. Seriously, think about it: More meat, less bun! If those are not words to live by, then I am a vegetarian, which I’m not.

I’m not saying Al was perfect. Some of his ideas were just plain wrong. I cannot tell you how glad I am McDonald’s executives rejected his plans for The Lite Mac, a one-fifth pounder with 15 per cent less beef fat, and the McGobbler, made from ground turkey meat.

But I’ll always be grateful for what Al gave us. And I think the world would find itself in better shape in 2010 if we all started demanding more meat out of life, along with a lot less bun.

Sadly, Al Bernardin died last week. He died of a stroke. He was 81. I’m pretty sure I would have liked Al if I’d ever got the chance to meet him.

I think it would be a nice gesture if burger-loving guys around the world spent a few minutes at the start of this brand-new decade thinking about Al’s approach to life.

We should probably do this on our treadmills.

doug.speirs@freepress.mb.ca